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Pregnancy Humor Quotes
Quotes tagged as "pregnancy-humor"
Showing 1-18 of 18
“The circumstances surrounding your birth are not as important as the opportunity to live life.”
― Think Great: Be Great!
― Think Great: Be Great!
“Don't worry. Here's the thing I've learned about pregnancy. Everything feels like a crisis and everything turns out to be heartburn.”
― Say What You Will
― Say What You Will
“Birthday, Birthday, Birthday!
Celebrate your day of birth, no matter the circumstances of your birth.
Be thankful and joyful for the gift of life on this divine day.”
― Think Great: Be Great!
Celebrate your day of birth, no matter the circumstances of your birth.
Be thankful and joyful for the gift of life on this divine day.”
― Think Great: Be Great!
“You are pregnant, with child, in the family way. People, some of whom you hardly know, will begin to comment on your belly size. They might even give it a rub, like you have strapped an animal of some kind in your front side and given total strangers permission to pet you at their leisure.”
― Letting Go of Perfect: Women, Expectations, and Authenticity
― Letting Go of Perfect: Women, Expectations, and Authenticity
“We did not determine our fate into the world. What we know is we are here in the world.”
― Pearls of Wisdom: Great mind
― Pearls of Wisdom: Great mind
“The sacred gift of parenthood is inscribe in the universal words ‘Papa’ and ‘Mama’.”
― Think Great: Be Great!
― Think Great: Be Great!
“Culturally we cherish a pregnant woman...We say "Congratulations" when we see a pregnant woman, but there is usually an element of scandal associated with it. Pregnant women are either too young or too old, or it's too soon after another pregnancy, or she's going to get in trouble at work. She's too poor, too rich, too successful, too skinny, too fat, too crazy, too busy too single, too married, too too.”
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“Just as a child is conceived in a womb of a woman, miraculously, so is grace freely given by God, in sacred moment of salvation.”
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“...imagine you’re minding your own business, walking down the mall, looking for the perfect beard comb. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a midget ninja jumps out from behind one of those shiatsu massage chairs and rapid punches you in the stomach and lower back.”
― Suburban Luchador: Tales From the Burb Side
― Suburban Luchador: Tales From the Burb Side
“Can I go back and be pregnant again just so I can have the information in this book to guide me? Maybe I can convince my husband to have #7… PREGNANCY, OMG! is equal parts informative, beautiful, and everything every mother must know.” — ”
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“As a practicing OB-GYN for the past twenty-five years, I’ve heard the concerns of thousands of pregnant women, not to mention having dealt with the personal challenges of my own three pregnancies. Still, I must admit: even I learned a few things reading PREGNANCY, OMG!!” ”
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“Very few people know that my wife actually said, "Hold my beer!" to me as she was in labor and getting ready to bear down. I guess she didn't want to spill it... (Note: for the record, she was NOT drinking alcohol at the time, which would've been both insanely funny, and exceptionally irresponsible).”
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“...every time I exhaled, I either peed or farted.”
― They Can Kill You..but They Can't Eat You
― They Can Kill You..but They Can't Eat You
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