I don’t know how I haven’t read this book before now because amnesia is one of my absolute favourite tropes. I came across this scrolling through one I don’t know how I haven’t read this book before now because amnesia is one of my absolute favourite tropes. I came across this scrolling through one of the apps my local library uses to lend out eBooks and I knew as soon as I read the blurb, I had to read it.
Gracie and her fiancé Blake are in a car accident that results in Gracie being in a coma. When she wakes up, she has no memory of herself and her life. She can identify flowers but she doesn’t know how to tie her own shoelaces. She can’t remember how to cook an omelet. And she has absolutely no memory of Blake and the love that they apparently shared. And she cannot face him – she wants time to reassess her life, to see if the memories come back. She flees her Melbourne apartment for her late mother’s Daylesford farm, where they once grew fields of flowers. There she meets Flynn, a handsome and helpful neighbour who suddenly proves indispensable but makes her very confused about her future.
I think this book really captures the terror and disconnect of waking up and not having any of your memories – not just about the people you know, but about yourself as well. Gracie, free from the choices of her “previous self”, the self before the accident, finds herself drinking coffee, eating eggs, much to the shock of her best friend, who insists that she doesn’t eat eggs and she only drinks herbal tea. She finds herself in an apartment that is unfamiliar, with a career that feels uninspiring. When a real estate agent calls her about her mother’s property in Daylesford, Gracie decides that she will go there and see if there are any answers to be found.
One of the few things that Gracie seems to connect with, is flowers. They are among some of the first things that she can truly remember, with bits and pieces of information coming to her. When she arrives at the property, she can identify the remains of plants, but she still has to do research and suddenly comes up with the idea to passionately resurrect the flower farm. It’s going to be a challenge, but Gracie has something to focus on and it does seem that the more time she spends there, the more keeps trickling back to her although it’s the tiniest portions of information.
There’s a large portion of this plot where it’s difficult to talk about without spoiling a rather key piece of information. The key piece of information isn’t difficult for the reader to figure out at an appropriate time (well before Gracie does, but that is intentional, I think) but it’s something where they shouldn’t be informed about prior to beginning the book. I did find it really interesting but I was also in two minds about it as well because it involved someone not following someone else’s wishes. I understand why they did it but the fact of the matter was that they still did it and that did make me feel very conflicted about that. I can only guess at how confused and betrayed Gracie must’ve felt upon the reveal, how a lot of her inner turmoil was exacerbated because of this.
I really like fresh flowers but I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t know much about them. I enjoy buying the odd bunch when I’m out and about, to brighten up my home (not that that’s a thing, these days!). So I really enjoyed a lot of the information about growing them for commercial sale and Daylesford is a place that’s not too far from where I live and it’s a place I’ve visited. It’s a beautiful town (cold in the winter though!) and it was great to enjoy a book in a setting that was familiar but not necessarily one that I’ve come across too many times before, reading Australian-set fiction. I appreciated the connections Gracie forged in the town, the friendships she built as she struggled to find herself in more ways than one. I found it interesting that this was a catalyst for her changing almost every aspect of her life, rebuilding it almost by herself, as she seeks to find the person she once was. She doesn’t want people to tell her about her past likes and dislikes, her past jobs and hobbies, she wants to remember them or if she cannot do that, discover them on her own. Makes me wonder – if the same thing happened to me, what would I discover about myself? Would I reach for a book each day? Still make myself a cup of tea first thing in the morning? Choose that certain chocolate or favourite treat? Would I still dislike all seafood? Or completely free of my prejudices and established biases, would I feel differently about many things? It’s a really interesting thing to ponder, I think.
I really enjoyed this – it was a beautiful, thoughtful story and explored a lot of the reasons why I love books that feature amnesia....more
I love love love amnesia books, they’re one of my favourite things. I also love books set in Ireland so this sounded absolutely amazing. The premise sI love love love amnesia books, they’re one of my favourite things. I also love books set in Ireland so this sounded absolutely amazing. The premise seems really interesting – I’m also an avid watcher of MayDay or Air Crash Investigations as it’s known here and I find plane crashes in terms of who survives and who doesn’t sometimes really fascinating. Clementine is the sole survivor of a plane crash near Shannon Airport in County Limerick and she wakes in hospital with no recollection of the plane crash or why she was even travelling to Ireland in the first place as she’s from Ohio. When her friendly nurse tells her that her father has arrived to see her, Clementine panics because she doesn’t want to hurt a man she can’t even remember with that fact and so she bails, convincing a stranger to take her away from the hospital.
And this is around the time I began to sort of struggle with this and considering that’s quite early in the story, I figured I was not going to love this. Clementine is a young woman in a vulnerable position, I get that. She’s supposed to be disoriented and terrified but she should’ve been seeking answers, not running from those who could provide them. Her reasons for leaving the hospital are pretty weak and the young man that takes her away, Keiran, probably has an even worse reason for doing what she requests are even worse. She’s the sole survivor of a plane crash, you’d think there’d be quite a lot of people wanting to speak to her, the NTSB first on the list but forget about that because the plane crash isn’t actually important and is rarely mentioned again and no one cares about why it crashed or anything else.
The romance would’ve had to have been pretty good to make me forget the practicalities of being the only survivor in a plane crash not that far from a major airport in a country that has a good aviation safety record and was carrying passengers from America, a country that has probably the best aviation investigation squad. Keiran is a reluctant rich kid, who finds that the perks of Daddy’s money don’t pay off when it means that you have to live your life as Daddy wishes. He’s staying in a country house with his sister and although he regularly disappears in the morning, he leaves Clementine (calling herself Jane, as she can’t identify with Clementine) money in order to purchase necessities as Clementine has spun some story about why she doesn’t have any belongings or money.
Holes, holes everywhere I’m afraid. Jane’s story is not remotely convincing and whilst I’m aware that everyone is a stranger to Clementine, running off from the hospital days after you survived a plane crash (with apparently no injuries other than the amnesia…) is really not the wisest decision to make. Also she didn’t want to hurt her father by not recognising him or not feeling any love for him or anything like that but she completely ignores what disappearing might do to her father, who almost lost his only child once. Surely actually having Clementine’s physical presence, even if mentally she is absent, would be much more comforting than having her vanish from the hospital with a potentially serious medical condition, no money, no knowledge of the country, nothing. I’m honestly not sure what Clementine hoped to accomplish from her flight. She says something about waiting ‘two weeks’ but this seemed some sort of ridiculously random attempt to pacify herself that what she’d done was okay.
I didn’t like Keiran much in the beginning and I’m afraid my dislike for him only grew as I got deeper into the story and more and more about him was revealed, which explains why he buys “Jane’s” dodgy story. He didn’t seem charming and although he seems oddly kind at first, I ended up feeling quite uncomfortable about his actions by the end of the book. They were really controlling, even though it’s wrapped up in his laid back, nice guy persona there’s no doubt that he knew exactly the sorts of things he was doing and it could’ve gone very, very wrong. In fact I think it’s poor writing that one part of what Keiran does is glossed over like it’s no big deal when it’s actually a huge deal. I was lukewarm on him before that but I really ended up disliking him. Actually I didn’t like Clementine that much either. The best characters were the minor characters of Clive and Keiran’s prickly sister Siobahn.
This had a promising premise but overall I just felt that the execution wasn’t up to what I was expecting. The romance wasn’t anywhere near enough for me – I never really felt a connection between Clementine and Keiran and I feel as though it will only be more problematic when Clementine properly recalls everything. Grief is not something that you can forget or skip, even if things didn’t turn out the way someone planned. I actually feel like a lot of this storyline made things so much worse for Clementine and others. I think I would’ve enjoyed this more if, she had to run away, that she did it on her own, without really needing Keiran around to provide for her and for her to cling to. He’s hiding a lot of secrets and I don’t think he was entirely acting out of kindness in the end. It may have developed into something like that but with all the info, looking back makes his appearance and actions seem a bit creepy.
**A copy of this book was provided by the publisher via NetGalley for the purposes of a review**...more
Frank wakes up in the hospital to be told that he was in a car accident. He lost his spleen and also pretty much all of his memories – he has amnesia.Frank wakes up in the hospital to be told that he was in a car accident. He lost his spleen and also pretty much all of his memories – he has amnesia. He doesn’t know who he is, who the people in his room are or much of anything else really. All he knows is that he’s a lawyer, the one who writes the contracts and specialises in the small print.
No one ever reads the terms and conditions of a contract, especially when they can run to pages and pages. Frank knows this and it’s his job to write contracts that protect his firm’s clients. After the accident, Frank begins to piece back together his life. He has a wife he doesn’t remember and although he does have memories of his younger brother Malcolm, who is travelling overseas, it takes him a little while to remember his older brother Oscar but there’s a simmering resentment that only grows as Frank begins to regain more and more memories of his childhood and working life.
The more Frank remembers, the less he likes of his life, his job and even himself. What is politely referred to as a “little episode” was really a fully fledged breakdown and now Frank knows what drove him to it. He’s ready to fix things, starting with his own life and he can’t help but use his skills in all their glory to rewrite his own life. After all, no one ever reads the fine print…do they?
There’s been a little bit of a buzz building about this book over the last few weeks and I was super excited when it turned up in my mailbox and I could check out what the fuss is all about. Of course the danger with a buzz is that the book doesn’t live up to it but luckily, that’s not the case with Terms & Conditions.
For starters, I absolutely love the way this book is written. It’s written like the terms and conditions of a contract, broken down into sections (ie Conditon 1 Amnesia) and then each part within that section is headed with something pertinent as Frank pieces back together his life. There are footnotes (the footnotes are hilarious) and this book is just so clever and fun to read. I read it all in one sitting because I was desperate to find out what Frank’s story was and what had caused his problems before the accident but it’s the sort of book you could read in bits and pieces because the way it’s written gives you many places to stop and not lose the thread.
Frank’s job is to write the terms and conditions of lengthy contracts and they can run into the pages. He’s so good that some of his work has become industry standard in some places and he still sees lines he wrote years ago being incorporated. It’s his job to write the bit that basically screws someone over – they think they’re covered but really they’re not because some some clause Frank stuck in the terms and conditions. He’s excellent at what he does but he’s also becoming somewhat jaded with it. He works for his father’s firm, which his father left to all three of his sons however there are some complications and Frank has some issues with where his older brother is taking the business. Frank is also married to a woman named Alice. He doesn’t remember her at the beginning of the book and when memories of her start to return, he realises that who they are now are not who they were when they met or when they got married.
For much of the book, Frank is on the backfoot. He’s been injured in an accident, he didn’t have any memories and now he’s got to slowly piece it all back together. As he recalled more and more I started to get a bit frustrated with him because he wasn’t doing anything with his information. He was very passive, allowing people to walk all over him, to take shots at him, to exclude him from what was rightfully his. But then….Frank begins to put together a plan. And it is, quite honestly, one of the most brilliant things I’ve ever read. He uses his professional skills to put into motion something that will not only help him considerably but also punish those that wronged him and to also right some of his own wrongs. In the most incredible way.
Terms & Conditions is one of the standout novels of the year. It’s format is fresh and different and it’s written with incredible humour and skill. Frank is a great character, an everyday man who appears to be fighting something much bigger than him. In a way, Frank’s victory is a win for the little man and if you like cheering for the underdog then I think you’ll love Frank. You want him to succeed and you want others to get what they deserve. This is the sort of book that’s very satisfying because not only is Frank fighting for himself, but he’s also fighting for right against wrong. He wants to do something that will make amends for some of the contracts he’s written in the past and he wants to do something that he can be proud of and stand up for what he believes in and what is important to him.
When I first finished this book, I rated it an 8 but on further reflection writing this review, I’m going to increase it to a 9 because I think it took breaking it down like this to realise how very clever it was and what it’s saying beneath the surface. There are layers here, the bleakness, the black humour, the family relationships, the work environment, the struggle with things that go against your moral code and the quest to just stop standing by and do something.
And the footnotes. There can never be too many footnotes....more
Lucie comes to awareness when she’s up to her knees in the chilly waters in San Francisco Bay. She cannot remember who she is or why she is there and Lucie comes to awareness when she’s up to her knees in the chilly waters in San Francisco Bay. She cannot remember who she is or why she is there and after a barrage of tests, she is waiting in a psychiatric facility for someone, anyone, to discover her identity and begin to unravel who and what she is.
Answers come in the form of her tall, handsome and kindhearted fiance Grady who has been searching for her in their home of Seattle. Despite the fact that Lucie wants to know things, she’s apprehensive about this man that she doesn’t know. Back in the perfect house in Seattle, looking at her designer clothes and shoes and staring at her bland diet, Lucie begins wondering precisely who she was. She doesn’t feel at all like this person that she’s finding out she used to be. She doesn’t know how to be this person, she’s not sure if she can ever be this person that Grady loves, ever again.
Lucie’s searching for the answers and she’s furious to discover that in a misguided attempt to protect her, Grady has been hiding things from her. Lucie sets out to talk to her only remaining relative, seeking the answers for so many questions. But the past can be a very dangerous thing to poke – you never know what you’re going to unlock. For Lucie, in order to unlock the mysteries of her mind and why it shutdown, she must face something that she has buried deep within her psyche. It’s not going to be easy and Lucie doesn’t know what will come out at the end of it. Can she ever love the man whom she was going to marry in this previous life of hers? And will he be able to accept this new her, the one that is nothing like the old one?
I got a promotional email about this book from NetGalley and skipped off immediately to request it because of course, it contains one of my favourite things – amnesia story! I’ve read three of them relatively recently, all of them quite different. Two were contemporary romances but differed in that in one it was the female character who had the amnesia but in the other it was the male character. This one is more concerned with a mental trauma, an incident that occurred in Lucie’s past that led to her “dissociative fugue”.
I can’t think of many more frightening things than not knowing who you are and having people that you don’t know come to take you home. In this case, the only person Lucie seems to have is her fiance Grady so essentially she has to go home with a strange man and live with him. Once she gets there, she learns that the person she was feels very alien to her. Lucie discovers a sweet tooth but apparently pre-amnesia Lucie never touched anything sweet. The hoardes of make up, clothes and shoes mean she was obviously someone who cared an awful lot about her appearance but new Lucie can’t be bothered with all of that. She and Grady tiptoe around each other – Grady because he’s terrified that Lucie will leave him again and Lucie because she doesn’t know how to relate to him. It seems that each time one of them wants to reach out, something happens to make the other wounded. And when Lucie finds out that Grady has been keeping things from her (not maliciously, more out of a desire to cater to the thoughts and feelings of the pre-amnesia Lucie) then she’s furious. She finally gets the truth out of him about what happened the day she ran away and that combined with the information Grady has been keeping from her provide what she needs to begin unlocking the closed doors of her memory.
I quite enjoyed the story of Lucie discovering that she didn’t really like the person she had been before her amnesia. She didn’t like her taste in clothes, felt oddly about her hairstyle and make up and when she gets home to her house in Seattle, she discovers that she wasn’t at all neighbourly either. When new-Lucie makes attempts to be friendly, others respond with amazement and downright suspicion. It seems that Grady doesn’t particularly know how to be around her either – at first Lucie thinks he might be hiding a lover but he’s hiding something much bigger than that.
I felt so sorry for Grady – the reader is treated to his point of view in the book too so quite often you get a sense of his love for Lucie but he has a hard time being able to express it. Partially I think, because of old-Lucie and also because of what happened the day she left. Grady operates in fear that she’s going to leave again, to disappear. His attempts to give her space, to acquiesce to her wishes often leave new-Lucie feeling as though Grady is indifferent to her. And the few times she does reach out to him, something happens to make it more of a set-back than a way forward. I’d have liked a little more focus on their feelings for one another – we do get Grady’s feelings for the first Lucie very strongly but his thoughts on new Lucie are more guarded. And in reverse, new Lucie muddles through her feelings for Grady but we don’t really get how first Lucie felt about him and the original attraction from her point of view.
I think that the exploration of Lucie’s mental trauma felt a bit rushed as it was more towards the end. She seemed to gather the information she required rather quickly and from that it was a simple step to connect it all and suddenly unlock everything that she had filed away so grimly. There’s no doubt what happened was traumatising and it was easy to see how a teenager might block that out. However I was surprised at the way her guardians, her uncle and aunt, tried to deal with it when she came into their custody. I honestly expected that given their earlier history, that they’d have done a lot more for her to see that she was mentally sound. It felt like they let her down a little, not out of lack of caring for her, but probably out of a lack of understanding at what such a thing could do.
Love Water Memory was a very easy book to become involved with even though it’s often hard to connect with a character who doesn’t know who they are. I felt for Lucie though, as she tried to piece together her information and discover why she could not relate to the person that she had been. And I really liked Grady as a character and the struggle that he went through as well....more
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