Max Knoblauch is the Assistant Humor Editor in the NYC office. He is a journalist, comedian and illustrator. More humor and art by Max can be found on his website.Follow him @MaxKnoblauch
By Max Knoblauch
11 stories from 2017 to remind us all that animals are getting smarter and committing more crimes
This list includes an arsonist tortoise and a dog threatening his owner with a knife.
Aaron Judge narrowly edged out Big Bird in NYC mayoral write-in votes
Someone voted for Yoda.
Jeffrey Tambor on sexual misconduct allegations: 'I don’t see how I can return to Transparent.'
The actor stated that the "politicized atmosphere" of the set has led him to choose to exit the Emmy-winning show.
Two months after Hurricane Maria, thousands march in Washington for Puerto Rico
60 days after the storm made landfall, 50% of the island is still without power.
Junior league goalie scores on empty net and everyone absolutely loses their minds
The goalie goal continues to be the best event in all of sports.
Chance the Rapper wants this holiday song to make him the Mariah Carey of Thanksgiving
In the spirit of giving, Chance the Rapper wants to make a truckload of money from a hit holiday song.
A Philadelphia grandfather was buried with his beloved cheesesteaks
This man's love for Pat's cheesesteaks runs DEEP.
This Twitter thread explains how Cheesecake Factory became the weirdest restaurant on earth
A Twitter thread examines Cheesecake Factory's desing styles, which range from Greco-Roman to, uh, 'The Lord of The Rings.'
As a GOP congressman, I'm happy to answer questions about our tax plan. But wouldn't you rather hear about my new puppies!?
I have met 10 non-millionaires in my entire life and every single one of them works in my office.
The day my fan fiction foretold of has come: Khal Drogo and Tormund met IRL and are now best friends
Tormund and Drogo unfortunately never got the opportunity to meet in the show, because Drogo died of the flu or whatever.
A checklist of 75 things we are willing to predict Trump will do in the near future
"Yeah, that'll probably happen."
By Tyler Schmall and Max Knoblauch
A timeline of the rogue Twitter employee's last day at work before deleting Trump's account
5:30 p.m.: Employee watches the first 25 minutes of Netflix's What the Health at desk without headphones.
Raccoon ate too much and got stuck in a sewer grate, something that has happened to the best of us
We all know the feeling of being too bloated to remove yourself from the sewer.
Noel Gallagher's band has a killer scissors player (someone who plays the scissors)
Ah, scissors, the things you use to make beautiful British rock music.
Crap, I forgot to get furious about the Starbucks holiday cup this year
Ah, hell, I've been so busy this year I forgot to get red, stinking mad about the Starbucks holiday cup and then write a long, deranged thing about it.
Betsy DeVos dressed as Ms. Frizzle for Halloween and everyone's thrilled! No just kidding they are very mad.
'The Magic School Bus' has been scrapped for parts. Welcome to: The Normal School Van.
I am 100% on board with Jose Canseco's compelling 'Stranger Things' theory
Canseco's Origin of Species.
Gwyneth Paltrow's 'Seven' themed Halloween costume needs a spoiler alert
What's in the box? Just Gwyneth again.
Mexico City's Day of the Dead Parade featured tributes to earthquake victims and rescue workers
The Day of the Dead, or Día de los Muertos, is a centuries-old Mexican celebration honoring the lives of the deceased.
This ex-Obama speechwriter dressed up as Jared Kushner wearing a blazer in Iraq for Halloween
A well-executed Obama camp cosplay.
Trump's motorcade crossed paths with a cyclist and she had a special message for the president
The odds that President Trump will make a statement claiming the middle finger is a sign of great respect have shifted to about 2 to 1.
'Paul Ryan magazine' is a 192-page periodical dedicated to the most unpopular politician in the country
The most unpopular politician in America, now in full-color print!
I'm Stephen Hawking and I'm thrilled to release my other PhD thesis: 'Where Bugs Go In The Winter (Hell)'
The world's greatest mind tackles the world's greatest question.
