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Reviews
First Knight (1995)
Should've listened to my gut
Back in 1995 when so many big blockbusters were coming out, I remember this coming out and I had a sixth sense of sorts to know if I'd like a film or not. I had the feeling I wouldn't like this film so I skipped it. Fast forward to 2022, it happened to be free to watch so I gave it a chance..., and this is one big stinker. My biggest gripe is the three way romance. Connery was way too old for her by 35 years so I didn't see the attraction there. And her and Gere had no chemistry what-so-ever. So it was really hard to buy into the romance. Instead of feeling it, the filmmakers are wanting you to use your head and say, 'of course she likes Arthur, that's Sean Connery! Of course she likes Lancelot, that's Richard Gere.' Add in the usual romantic tropes we've seen a thousand times and you're conditioned to think that this is a believable romance, you don't actually feel it. Add to it that this is directed by one of the Zucker brothers just adds to my confusion as to why there's not any good jokes in it.
UHF (1989)
If Weird Al's station...
...really existed today, it'd be the best thing on TV!!! Some of those titles on his lineup board, Leave it to Bigfoot and Druids on Parade are titles that just can't miss! Combine that with the weekly feature film like Ghandi 2, and people wouldn't need anything else! When the promo for Conan The Librarian comes on for "tonight at 7:30." You can be sure I'd be home by 7:25 no matter what to be ready!
Fracture (2007)
Sub par
If you follow movies and you come across one 12 years after it came out and has huge stars in it and you wonder why you never heard of it, this movie is a prime example of that phenomenon. At best, they came up with a clever plot to circumvent double jeopardy but that was all they had going. The most trouble wasn't the convenient plot holes but more the characters. Gosling appeared to be doing a lame McConoughey impression. At best his acting style is that of an actor trying to act like an actor. Hopkins was doing a Lecter impression but at least he was interesting and had me rooting for him to getaway with it, not the film's intent! The sub plot of Gosling going to another law firm took way too much away from the main plot for no reason. Nothing seemed fleshed out and seemed to take place in that world where plot devices conveniently pop up when necessary. At least they ended it without us knowing the result of the trial. I like to think he got off the hook again!
Hell or High Water (2016)
Not Shot in Texas
In addition to my review about this being an affront to Texas, it was filmed in New Mexico. In fact the same location as Breaking Bad's penultimate episode.
Bob Lazar: Area 51 & Flying Saucers (2018)
Production Value Zero
Turned it off soon after the guy talking by the indoor pool, the echo was so distracting and unprofessional that I'm shocked Netflix distributed this. If that's the best audio they got, they should've left it out or gone back to re-do the interview. The fact they left it in speaks to the shabbiness of the entire film.
Serpico (1973)
How NYC has changed
It's unreal to see how much NYC has changed, for better and worse, since the 70's. Of course people have been saying this since the 90's. The city back then can be described as what a third world slum or a city still bombed out from WWII might look like. Trash everywhere, paint peeling from walls, excessive signs of use on everything. Nowadays I'd chalk the latter up to great production design but it was all real. It's astounding to see how people let everything slide. In the notes, Lumet says the actual down-trodden real location police station depicted here had later become a cliche. NYC is cleaner and safer today but it came at a price. The character is gone. Those shots of south Brooklyn crumbling row homes with the trade center in the background are now high rent reserved for the privileged uptight bores. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, it's just too bad all that changed came at that cost.
Blood (2018)
Confusing
This show started off really well. The mystery was set up nicely and you really feel your're in Cat's corner trying to bring her father to justice. The show starts to feel rushed as Cat learns startling information but always plays her cards too quickly. The show goes off the rails a bit with Frank being hit by Cat's car. The how and why he did this was very confusing. The last episode (SPOILERS) is where things just didn't seem right. The dad was actually a really warm hearted guy and doting husband to his sick wife. So much so you wonder why was he such a jerk in the beginning of the series. And he was so loving there seemed no motivation to fall in love with Sarah. Everything was set in to motion with Cat's discovery of the missing frog. Why would the dad hide the frog in the first place if how the wife hit her head on it was from falling accidentally?
Schitt$ Creek (2015)
Truly terrible
I can't say anything more than what's been said about this show already. The positive reviews are suspect so I figured I'd cancel one out. There are two good things. I enjoy watching Eugene Levy. And the other thing, it is like being glued to a train wreck. It's interesting to watch just to see how bad it can get!
Schitt$ Creek (2015)
Truly terrible
I can't say anything more than what's been said about this show already. The positive reviews are suspect so I figured I'd cancel one out. There are two good things. I enjoy watching Eugene Levy. And the other thing, it is like being glued to a train wreck. It's interesting to watch just to see how bad it can get!
Planet Earth II (2016)
Great photography but...
Such great photography I cannot fathom how some shots were made. The music however was way too overpowering at times. And the sound effects were way overpowering. Deep bass accompanying an edit, blasts of bass for ocean waves.
BMX Bandits (1983)
Kicked off America's short lived facination with Australia
As a bmx kid in the 80's there was nowhere to turn for inspiration until this gem started running on HBO. Even though there was little bmx'ing going on, it was still more than any film at the time. It also opened the door to Australian cinema. Followed shortly with Crocodile Dundee and closing shortly after with Yahoo Serious', Young Einstein.
Dark Tourist (2018)
Great Locations and somewhat disturbing
This show typifies the saying that it takes all kinds to make the world go around. Some of the locations are truly astounding and must be seen to understand the human experience. The city in Turkmenistan was truly bizarre and belongs in a James Bond movie.
Some of the people were very disturbing. For me the most disturbing are the selfie takers and people who film everything! The show points these people out very well. The most disturbing were the Manson fans idly recording everything the host was doing which I suspect was only to post to their social media for the lofty goal of getting likes and views. More disturbing selfie moments were with dead bodies and destroyed cities. Then there is the one guy who had a bag of hair products because he must look good when walking through atomic wastelands. We truly live in a world where it's just about showing up and saying look at me.
Seven Seconds (2018)
Probably could've made a better 2 hour film
Despite the story being interesting it has every Netflix cliche in the book right down to a main character vomiting from emotional turmoil, which is getting downright laughable as it's in most every show. Then you have the rookie with a newborn riding around with stereotypical tough talking Jersey cops who of course aren't good cops. There's the main character with a shadowy past and therefore has an alcohol problem. Then there's the scene where a character just happens to recognize the killer on the street, a person she recognizes from a dark hospital room.
Technically it's has great New Jersey locations. It's shot really dark, probably using minimal production lighting. I don't know what to think about that other than it called attention to itself.
That said, the story is intriguing but it's such a slow burn of people suffering, long whispered conversations and darkness that is being overused lately. it probably could've been a great 2 hour film.
3% (2016)
The Second Season Disappointed Me.
I really enjoyed the first season. The premise was great and the story moved along great. There are a lot of good things about season 2 but it really gets bogged down with melodrama, flashbacks and dreams that stall the forward momentum without really adding anything about the cause and the inland that we didn't know already other than there's a lot of interpersonal squabbling. The offshore is reduced to a place where the people are all Villains whereas in season one there was more depth from what we saw of offshore people.