Manny's Reviews > Beowulf

Oh, how I wish I had written this poem, which I found reproduced in Henry Beard's Poetry for Cats!

Grendel's Dog, from BEOCAT

by the Old English Epic's Unknown Author's Cat*

Brave Beocat, | brood-kit of Ecgthmeow,
Hearth-pet of Hrothgar | in whose high halls
He mauled without mercy | many fat mice,
Night did not find napping | nor snack-feasting.
The wary war-cat, | whiskered paw-wielder,
Bearer of the burnished neck-belt | gold-braided collar band,
Feller of fleas | fatal, too to ticks,
The work of wonder-smiths, | woven with witches’ charms,
Sat upon the throne-seat | his ears like sword-points
Upraised, sharp-tipped, | listening for peril-sounds,
When he heard from the moor-hill | howls of the hell-hound,
Gruesome hunger-grunts | of Grendel’s Great Dane,
Deadly doom-mutt, | dread demon-dog.
Then boasted Beocat, | noble battle-kitten,
Bane of barrow-bunnies, | bold seeker of nest-booty:
“If hand of man unhasped | the heavy hall-door
And freed me to frolic forth | to fight the fang-bearing fiend,
I would lay the whelpling low | with lethal claw-blows;
Fur would fly | and the foe would taste death-food.
But resounding snooze-noise, | stern slumber-thunder,
Nose-music of men snoring | mead-hammered in the wine-hall,
Fills me with sorrow-feeling | for Fate does not see fit
To send some fingered folk | to lift the firm-fastened latch
That I might go grapple | with the grim ghoul-pooch.”
Thus spoke the mouse-shredder, | hunter of hall-pests,
Short-haired Hrodent-slayer, | greatest of the pussy-Geats.

* Modern English verse translation by the Editor's Cat.