As others have said, this is probably the best book on depression out there, certainly the best I have read. It's pretty good at explaining what depreAs others have said, this is probably the best book on depression out there, certainly the best I have read. It's pretty good at explaining what depression is and what causes it. We learn depression, the author writes, because the skills of depression were at one point necessary for our survival. And everything we learn, we can also unlearn. And to explain the unlearning part, the book launches us into things such as mood journals and some basics of cognitive behavioral therapy.
I think he gives the best definition of depression when he says something like, depression isn't sadness or absence of joy, it's absence of vitality and spontaneous feeling. EDIT The actual quote: "... the opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality - the ability to experience a full range of emotion, including happiness, excitement, sadness, and grief."
But I feel that psychotherapy can do more harm than good when it isn't done right, and that it probably, most often, unfortunately, isn't done right. And that it certainly cannot be done in book form. So, read this book as a pre-emptive strike against depression, or if you want to understand more about it, but don't use it for self-therapy.
For anyone interested in what the author actually has to say (rather than my random thoughts), you can read an excellent Q&A with him here: http://www.nytimes.com/1998/01/11/nyr....
I enjoyed the insights the author provided into the history of learned helplessness theory, as well as bits and pieces about the beginnings of cognitiI enjoyed the insights the author provided into the history of learned helplessness theory, as well as bits and pieces about the beginnings of cognitive behavioral therapy. This book has a lot of research and quite a bit of psychology in it, some of it boring to me, some of it fascinating, some of it convincing, some of it unconvincing.
It is not just a self-help guide to positive thinking. In fact, the author decries positive thinking, making the point that chanting inflated mantras to oneself daily is ineffective in the long run.
Instead, he says, we must learn to rationally dispute our pessimistic thoughts the way we would dispute a verbal attack on us by a rival. There are three chapters teaching how to do just that, with one chapter focusing specifically on how to teach children those same skills. Children seem to be on Seligman's mind a lot, as a good portion of his research focuses on them. I agreed with everything he had to say about children, and about the effect divorce has on them (basically he says, don't divorce!, and, don't fight in front of them!, and in this day and age, that's a brave thing to say. I love him for that).
He says many brave things, and I agree with most of them. Some of his statements are over-simplified and unconvincing, however. I am not satisfied with his reasoning as to why women are twice as likely as men to suffer from depression (it's their tendency to ruminate, he says). And while I generally agree with his theory that the epidemic of depression has hit us because of our increased focus on the "I" and individual rights, coupled with a decrease in the "We" (ie community, country, duty, God, meaning), it leaves unexplained why groups such as stay-at-home mothers, one of those last valiant troops left fighting in the "We" battlefield, are at particular risk for depression. Are they more pessimistic as a group? Do they ruminate even more than working mothers? Unlikely.
To be fair, his research isn't concerned with the why of depression, but rather with the how to beat it in the long-run. Given that, I wish he had focused a bit more on actual skill teaching (in the end, what he actually teaches is only a few pages long), or at the least provided a work book to accompany his main book.
In either case, this was certainly an interesting read. And as I agree with him that depression will be the thing to beat for future generations, I can't wait to read his "The Optimistic Child: Proven Program to Safeguard Children from Depression & Build Lifelong Resilience."
I don't want to go into personal detail, but this book has been an eye opener in many ways, not only about the mental illness called Borderline PersonI don't want to go into personal detail, but this book has been an eye opener in many ways, not only about the mental illness called Borderline Personality Disorder, but about self-destructive, manipulative, aggressive, abusive behaviors and co-dependency in general.
The message is clear: You can't fix the other person, so don't go around playing God.
The author is compassionate, towards both the ill person and their relatives. It doesn't point fingers, it offers concrete help. I don't usually like self-help books, but this one really is a life-line for people who live with and love a Borderliner (in whatever form). ...more
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