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Hold You Down
Hold You Down is an edgy novel from rising star Tracy Brown about the perils of love and the ties that bind…
New York City. Late 1980s to early 1990s.
Mercy and Lenox Howard have always only had each other. Growing up on the mean streets of Harlem with an absentee mother meant that they had to have each other's backs. Now young, smart mothers they are determined to survive in New York City while raising their two sons, who have bright futures ahead of them.
Mercy is the quiet, straight laced hospital administrator, struggling to make ends meet. At night and on weekends, she pours her heart into her cooking and her dream of owning her own restaurant. Lenox is the diva, the wild child, looking for excitement and her big come up in life and love. Their boys, Deon and Judah, have been raised more like brothers than cousins, forging a bond that is unbreakable.
When Lenox heads down a path that she believes will bring success and power, it changes the entire course of her life and her family’s life forever. As a result of their mother’s choices, cousins Deon and Judah soon find themselves in uncharted territory.
New York City. Late 1980s to early 1990s.
Mercy and Lenox Howard have always only had each other. Growing up on the mean streets of Harlem with an absentee mother meant that they had to have each other's backs. Now young, smart mothers they are determined to survive in New York City while raising their two sons, who have bright futures ahead of them.
Mercy is the quiet, straight laced hospital administrator, struggling to make ends meet. At night and on weekends, she pours her heart into her cooking and her dream of owning her own restaurant. Lenox is the diva, the wild child, looking for excitement and her big come up in life and love. Their boys, Deon and Judah, have been raised more like brothers than cousins, forging a bond that is unbreakable.
When Lenox heads down a path that she believes will bring success and power, it changes the entire course of her life and her family’s life forever. As a result of their mother’s choices, cousins Deon and Judah soon find themselves in uncharted territory.
336 pages, Paperback
First published November 1, 2022
About the author
Tracy Brown
82 books1,454 followersI am a storyteller, a painter of words, a writer who genuinely loves my craft.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 653 reviews
February 6, 2023
It’s always painful to start a book with a lot of genuine interest to slowly hate most of it. Okay……..“hate” is a strong word, but I was really disappointed. I’m still generally glad I read it because there were a lot of valuable takeaways that anyone can benefit from.
Mercy and Lenox truly represented what a strenuous relationship between two black sisters in their situation would look like. There was so much love between them, yet when one is tired of living the same way and starts to put herself in risky situations while the other is holding fast to her values, things get really rocky. There are events that occur with these characters and honestly most of the characters in this book that I never saw coming!!!
Deon and Judah, even as kids, noticed a lot of this that forced them to see the world from a unique perspective. They highlight how everything that a parent does impacts their children for a long time one way or another. These characters were the ones that made me dislike the book by the end. I felt that their stories took such a drastic turn, and deep down, I think I know what Brown’s goal was but I still felt it was too much.
Nevertheless, I managed to finish this one and would still recommend if you don’t mind a heavy book.
Mercy and Lenox truly represented what a strenuous relationship between two black sisters in their situation would look like. There was so much love between them, yet when one is tired of living the same way and starts to put herself in risky situations while the other is holding fast to her values, things get really rocky. There are events that occur with these characters and honestly most of the characters in this book that I never saw coming!!!
Deon and Judah, even as kids, noticed a lot of this that forced them to see the world from a unique perspective. They highlight how everything that a parent does impacts their children for a long time one way or another. These characters were the ones that made me dislike the book by the end. I felt that their stories took such a drastic turn, and deep down, I think I know what Brown’s goal was but I still felt it was too much.
Nevertheless, I managed to finish this one and would still recommend if you don’t mind a heavy book.
August 6, 2023
My spirit is so unbelievably unsettled after reading this story that was filled with so much heaviness and trauma!! There was literally no relief and I don’t know how to feel after reading this book. There is soooooo much to unpack after this emotional listen. We don’t have all day so I’ll do my best to summarize what I’m feeling.
The story is centered around the lives of sisters Mercy and Lennox! Their trauma is deeply rooted in them from an early age. After their mother left them in the care of their grandmother to run behind a man who didn’t want a ready made family, these two sisters struggle through life. Mercy and Lennox were complete opposites. Mercy was level headed, responsible and calculated while Lennox was a risk taker and carefree. There was no doubt that these sisters loved each other and may even be consider best friends however, their life’s path couldn’t have been more different.
Both sisters are single mothers raising their sons to be more like brothers than cousins. Mercy was content with putting her dreams on hold so that her focus could remain on her son’s education while Lennox was determined to create a better life for her and her son by any means necessary with decisions that cost her greatly! Both sister wanted what was best for their boys but it just seemed like no matter what path they took, it didn’t matter because the inevitable was bound to happen!
My heart ACHED for these boys, more for Judah than Dion but both nonetheless! Much like their mothers, Judah was smart, kept his head down, was mild mannered and focused on going to college to make his mother proud! He was surely destined for greatness! Dion was confident, cocky and sure of himself. He wasn’t a bad apple but his circumstances and grief took him under and unfortunately one bad decision after the next resulted in the heartbreaking trauma his family faced!
I didn’t like the direction Judah’s story took at all!! AT ALL!!! It was so unbelievably heartbreaking that I don’t think I’ll ever recover! If there was any one character in this book that deserved to win, it was Judah and he was robbed of that opportunity!
I cried so much reading this book because I wanted everybody to win but sometimes life doesn’t work out that way no matter how bad we want it to. I did not like the ending at all and that part of Dion and Chanel’s storyline really could’ve been left out. Like damn didn’t Judah suffer enough?! There was honestly no excuse for their behavior and shame on both of them!! I would’ve loved an epilogue because we NEEDED a silver lining with Judah’s story GOODNESS!!! I wanted to read about him finding happiness and wholeness! Judah will stick with me for a really really REALLY long time! I can’t rewrite this story and will have to accept it for what it was but like a few other reviews stated READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!! Had I known what I know now, I wouldn’t have put myself through this! I will say, it was a very well written story!
The story is centered around the lives of sisters Mercy and Lennox! Their trauma is deeply rooted in them from an early age. After their mother left them in the care of their grandmother to run behind a man who didn’t want a ready made family, these two sisters struggle through life. Mercy and Lennox were complete opposites. Mercy was level headed, responsible and calculated while Lennox was a risk taker and carefree. There was no doubt that these sisters loved each other and may even be consider best friends however, their life’s path couldn’t have been more different.
Both sisters are single mothers raising their sons to be more like brothers than cousins. Mercy was content with putting her dreams on hold so that her focus could remain on her son’s education while Lennox was determined to create a better life for her and her son by any means necessary with decisions that cost her greatly! Both sister wanted what was best for their boys but it just seemed like no matter what path they took, it didn’t matter because the inevitable was bound to happen!
My heart ACHED for these boys, more for Judah than Dion but both nonetheless! Much like their mothers, Judah was smart, kept his head down, was mild mannered and focused on going to college to make his mother proud! He was surely destined for greatness! Dion was confident, cocky and sure of himself. He wasn’t a bad apple but his circumstances and grief took him under and unfortunately one bad decision after the next resulted in the heartbreaking trauma his family faced!
I didn’t like the direction Judah’s story took at all!! AT ALL!!! It was so unbelievably heartbreaking that I don’t think I’ll ever recover! If there was any one character in this book that deserved to win, it was Judah and he was robbed of that opportunity!
I cried so much reading this book because I wanted everybody to win but sometimes life doesn’t work out that way no matter how bad we want it to. I did not like the ending at all and that part of Dion and Chanel’s storyline really could’ve been left out. Like damn didn’t Judah suffer enough?! There was honestly no excuse for their behavior and shame on both of them!! I would’ve loved an epilogue because we NEEDED a silver lining with Judah’s story GOODNESS!!! I wanted to read about him finding happiness and wholeness! Judah will stick with me for a really really REALLY long time! I can’t rewrite this story and will have to accept it for what it was but like a few other reviews stated READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!! Had I known what I know now, I wouldn’t have put myself through this! I will say, it was a very well written story!
October 31, 2022
Where do I start?! This story was everything! It grabbed me from the very beginning, tugging at my heart strings until it finally broke it into pieces. Talk about growing pains with life, love, and loss…whew. I haven’t read anything that made me this emotional in a while. I’m giving this a 4.75/5 (rounding up to 5) only because I’m greedy and would have really appreciated some type of epilogue. Was it needed, nah not really, but again…it would have been greatly appreciated.
Tracy Brown is a wonderful storyteller, I haven’t been disappointed with anything I’ve read written by her. I’d definitely recommend this book to friends looking for lite urban contemporary fiction, involving family dynamics and coming of age stories.
Tracy Brown is a wonderful storyteller, I haven’t been disappointed with anything I’ve read written by her. I’d definitely recommend this book to friends looking for lite urban contemporary fiction, involving family dynamics and coming of age stories.
November 2, 2022
Hold You Down owes me nothing! Initially I was intrigued by the title and cover but the story on the pages really drew me in. It was raw, nostalgic, and heartbreaking at times. Heavy, basically!
The book is broken into two parts and it almost feels like a coming to age story because the first part is about the two sisters, Lennox and Mercy. Part two is more so about their sons, Deon and Judah. I loved the writing and storytelling- it felt like a movie or tv series was playing out on the pages. My heart ached for the boys and Mercy because I think Lennox’s decisions impacted them in so many ways. Lennox was the epitome of glitz and glamor but she got addicted to the fast money and street life- which ultimately became her downfall.
I think the author really showed how each character grieved and the different it impact it had on their story. It was also interesting that one mistake changed the trajectory of the story but that was real life- it happens, for sure. I also really loved that the book takes place in the late 80s but the writing was so well done, so detailed, and meshed well with that era. I loved the ending; it hurt me deeply. I totally understand that sometimes we have to let go of the ones we are holding down. Superb read!
CW: Drugs, Rape, DV
I received an ARC from Netgalley and the Publisher in exchange for an honest review.
The book is broken into two parts and it almost feels like a coming to age story because the first part is about the two sisters, Lennox and Mercy. Part two is more so about their sons, Deon and Judah. I loved the writing and storytelling- it felt like a movie or tv series was playing out on the pages. My heart ached for the boys and Mercy because I think Lennox’s decisions impacted them in so many ways. Lennox was the epitome of glitz and glamor but she got addicted to the fast money and street life- which ultimately became her downfall.
I think the author really showed how each character grieved and the different it impact it had on their story. It was also interesting that one mistake changed the trajectory of the story but that was real life- it happens, for sure. I also really loved that the book takes place in the late 80s but the writing was so well done, so detailed, and meshed well with that era. I loved the ending; it hurt me deeply. I totally understand that sometimes we have to let go of the ones we are holding down. Superb read!
CW: Drugs, Rape, DV
I received an ARC from Netgalley and the Publisher in exchange for an honest review.
June 9, 2024
I have no words for this book. Just read it! This is definitely one of them ones. I don’t know how I feel right now. 😢
♾️⭐️
Mercy and Judah will forever be in my heart! 🥺
♾️⭐️
Mercy and Judah will forever be in my heart! 🥺
August 3, 2023
I’m going to keep this brief! One thing Tracy Brown can do is write a book, I cried the hardest I’ve ever cried reading this.!!! However, wheeeeewwwwwwwwww did this thing piss me offfffff soooo offffff!!!! I’m just going to put this disclaimer here without any spoilers, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! This was stressful!
November 11, 2022
Hold You Down by Tracy Brown
12h 11m narrated by Patryce Williams, 336 pages
Genre: Historical Fiction, Romance, African-American Fiction
Featuring: Titled Chapters, Harlem, Staten Island, New York; Single Mothers, 1980s, 1990s, Crack Epidemic, Restaurateur, Timeline Discrepancies, Bad Choices, Depressing Drama
Rating as a movie: R
Songs for the soundtrack: "Chain of Fools" by Aretha Franklin, "Rapture" by Blondie, "Forget Me Nots" by Patrice Rushen, "Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)" by the Eurythmics, "Thriller" by Michael Jackson
My rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️😡
My thoughts: 📱50% 6:03:06 Lessons Learned - This was off to a slow start but found a mid-tempo rhythm. I'm not crazy about the story, but it is interesting. I feel a bit misled by the description, but it works. There are some math issues with the storyline, but I've been ignoring them. I don't care for the choices of either sister.
📱60% 7:19:52 Homecoming - This book is following all of the clichés of 90s hood movies. I wish it was written better. Emoji wasn't a word in 1990, and the narrator isn't that great. The MC isn't inspiring at all.
📱75% 9:09:37 Wonder - it's a little creepy that all of these percentages are in increments of 5. This story is on my nerves. The timeline of the story is meaningless and hard to follow; she gives dates, but the new dates don't add up with the passage of time from the previous chapters. Characters are using vocabulary and playing songs that factually weren't current at the time. It really turns me off to the story, but my main issue is that this entire book is a series of terrible decisions that should have been its title, Terrible Decisions. I'm still waiting for some sort of redemption; what has happened so far isn't enough.
I kind of hate this book. The characters, even the "good" ones, chose the poor choice every time, and it got on my nerves. The language was inaccurate, some of the music was inaccurate, and I never knew the time because she kept changing them, the ages didn't add up, and the mindsets of the characters were terrible. The narrator wasn't good for this story. I've heard her before, but this wasn't a good match. The end felt unfinished.
Recommend to others?: I don't. If you like trauma-drama or think Where the Line Bleeds is a great story, this is that type of story times 5.
12h 11m narrated by Patryce Williams, 336 pages
Genre: Historical Fiction, Romance, African-American Fiction
Featuring: Titled Chapters, Harlem, Staten Island, New York; Single Mothers, 1980s, 1990s, Crack Epidemic, Restaurateur, Timeline Discrepancies, Bad Choices, Depressing Drama
Rating as a movie: R
Songs for the soundtrack: "Chain of Fools" by Aretha Franklin, "Rapture" by Blondie, "Forget Me Nots" by Patrice Rushen, "Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)" by the Eurythmics, "Thriller" by Michael Jackson
My rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️😡
My thoughts: 📱50% 6:03:06 Lessons Learned - This was off to a slow start but found a mid-tempo rhythm. I'm not crazy about the story, but it is interesting. I feel a bit misled by the description, but it works. There are some math issues with the storyline, but I've been ignoring them. I don't care for the choices of either sister.
📱60% 7:19:52 Homecoming - This book is following all of the clichés of 90s hood movies. I wish it was written better. Emoji wasn't a word in 1990, and the narrator isn't that great. The MC isn't inspiring at all.
📱75% 9:09:37 Wonder - it's a little creepy that all of these percentages are in increments of 5. This story is on my nerves. The timeline of the story is meaningless and hard to follow; she gives dates, but the new dates don't add up with the passage of time from the previous chapters. Characters are using vocabulary and playing songs that factually weren't current at the time. It really turns me off to the story, but my main issue is that this entire book is a series of terrible decisions that should have been its title, Terrible Decisions. I'm still waiting for some sort of redemption; what has happened so far isn't enough.
I kind of hate this book. The characters, even the "good" ones, chose the poor choice every time, and it got on my nerves. The language was inaccurate, some of the music was inaccurate, and I never knew the time because she kept changing them, the ages didn't add up, and the mindsets of the characters were terrible. The narrator wasn't good for this story. I've heard her before, but this wasn't a good match. The end felt unfinished.
Recommend to others?: I don't. If you like trauma-drama or think Where the Line Bleeds is a great story, this is that type of story times 5.
January 26, 2023
But, like, why did it have to end like that??? 😭😭😭😭😭 This book really left me feeling so bad for Deon because it seemed no matter what he did it was always the wrong thing to do. This book was too raw and too fucking sad. I wasn’t ready. Be-fucking-ware.
April 2, 2023
I love Tracy Brown, but this book was HELLA depressing. I need to see a light at the end of the tunnel, and this one did not have it.
April 4, 2024
I’m crying … I’ll write a review later.
Read it tho. It was so good.
Read it tho. It was so good.
May 17, 2024
Whewww. This one was emotional and tough to read, but so good. This was a story about choices, consequences and allowing fear to keep you bolted in place and not allowing you to live outside the box. Started in the late 80’s and spanned through early 2000’s, this story was about two sisters who were complete opposites and explored the different paths they’d take due to the choices made. We all know that every choice comes with consequences.
Check your triggers because this story is full of them. It’s so good though and really makes you think.
Check your triggers because this story is full of them. It’s so good though and really makes you think.
March 5, 2024
I’ve never been the one to cry reading a book. And I just say my my my Tracy Brown!
This book had me feeling sorry from them since chapter 2. Those boys went through an enormous amount of trauma and grief. Mercy was so strong but she was too strong!
This was a very heavy read but it was also a great read!
This book had me feeling sorry from them since chapter 2. Those boys went through an enormous amount of trauma and grief. Mercy was so strong but she was too strong!
This was a very heavy read but it was also a great read!
July 12, 2022
Hold You Down is edgy urban fiction from upcoming author Tracy Brown. 5 out of 5 big, bright stars.
The story opens in Harlem in 1984 and follows sisters Mercy and Lenox Howard and their sons, Judah and Deon, respectively, through the following decades. They each have the opportunity, at different times, to “hold each other down”.
I had never before read anything by this author and was pleasantly surprised by this first captivating read. She accurately depicts the time period. Taking us back to the 80’s and 90’s through sight and sound. Ms. Brown made me feel the gamut of emotions. She reaches inside you and wrenches them free. The plot, narrative, and dialogue are raw, emotional, touching. Explores the price of loving, supporting, and holding down the ones you love, the cost of mistakes and missed opportunities, and how we adapt to what the world gives us. You’re left with only the aroma of dreams. I loved the ending; it was highly satisfying and appropriate. I recommend Hold You Down to all readers of multicultural interest and anyone looking for truly exceptional fiction.
My thanks to St. Martin’s Press, St. Martin’s Griffin, and NetGalley for the opportunity to read an advance copy of this book. However, the opinions expressed in this review are 100% mine and mine alone.
The story opens in Harlem in 1984 and follows sisters Mercy and Lenox Howard and their sons, Judah and Deon, respectively, through the following decades. They each have the opportunity, at different times, to “hold each other down”.
I had never before read anything by this author and was pleasantly surprised by this first captivating read. She accurately depicts the time period. Taking us back to the 80’s and 90’s through sight and sound. Ms. Brown made me feel the gamut of emotions. She reaches inside you and wrenches them free. The plot, narrative, and dialogue are raw, emotional, touching. Explores the price of loving, supporting, and holding down the ones you love, the cost of mistakes and missed opportunities, and how we adapt to what the world gives us. You’re left with only the aroma of dreams. I loved the ending; it was highly satisfying and appropriate. I recommend Hold You Down to all readers of multicultural interest and anyone looking for truly exceptional fiction.
My thanks to St. Martin’s Press, St. Martin’s Griffin, and NetGalley for the opportunity to read an advance copy of this book. However, the opinions expressed in this review are 100% mine and mine alone.
February 7, 2023
Quick thoughts! This is a story about two sisters, Mercy and Lenox, and their sons, Judah and Deon. I love a sibling novel and gosh does this explore all the ups and downs of that relationship and so much more.
I really loved this book and examining how the choices we make and the choices made for us affect so many lives. I listened to this on audio and the narrator was PHENOMENAL! I recommend it in that format for sure.
I really loved this book and examining how the choices we make and the choices made for us affect so many lives. I listened to this on audio and the narrator was PHENOMENAL! I recommend it in that format for sure.
June 24, 2023
All I can do is cry right now. Poor Judah. This is Tracy Brown best book. Judah is a character I know I will always remember.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 18, 2023
I enjoyed this book from start to finish. It felt like none of the characters got a break but then again in life sometimes you just can't catch a break and there is no happy ending. Lenox and Mercy were like night and day, two close sisters who were so different. I can't say Lenox got what she deserved because no-one deserves what happened to her but when you decide to sell drugs and try to be the biggest drug dealer in town you already know that you live by the sword you die by the sword.
Mercy just wanted to be the healer for everyone else. So much so that when she needed someone, she ended up alone. Well except for Barbara who stepped up like a best friend should. I wish Mercy had found her happiness with Xavier and moved out of state with him. I knew eventually he would move on because he deserved to so I hope he found the happiness he deserved with Jennifer although I know Mercy still had his heart always. Tommy tried to be there for Mercy but he was on the first thing smoking at the sign of trouble in paradise so ultimately he was no good for her. I believe she died from a broken heart.
Although Judah needed to get a backbone, I don't think him going to prison was the way to get one. I felt so bad for him because I was so rooting for him to go to Morgan State. He was on the right track and it goes to show that one little mistake can change the course of your life forever. I recall watching a Monique comedy special where she did a comedy show at a women's prison and as she was telling her jokes she kept saying "we are all one bad decision away from being cellmates", and that is how this book made me feel. Luv and Dre should have never been jumping Deon, then Dre would have lived!
Deon was just a lost kid after his mom died. Although he had a loving aunt and cousin who was more like a brother, he needed his mom. I can completely understand why he was the way he was. It's sad that it took his cousin going to jail to change his life. I'm glad he did though. I did think at the beginning of the story that it would be Deon who killed Gerard/G when he grew up. That would have been a dope storyline but I'm glad Benny killed him so Deon wouldn't have had to do it. I also thought that Lenox was going to start dealing with Benny and he was going to get her hooked on drugs. I was wrong there too.
The storyline with Chanel, man oh man, how many times do brothers fall out over a woman. I just didn't understand Judah, if he loved her so much he should have kept in touch. What the hell he expected her to do. As a matter of fact it wasn't his business what she did or who she did it with after the way he acted. I realize he was in prison and didn't want her to do the time with him but he could have explained that to her and let her make the decision. Once he didn't, she was free to do what she wanted. She fell in love with Deon and I thought it was a beautiful thing. He should have let them be happy. Some may think she owes her loyalty to Judah because he got the gun from her drawer (her brother Dallas gun) but she didn't tell him to.
Overall, this was a great read and I will read more from this author.
Mercy just wanted to be the healer for everyone else. So much so that when she needed someone, she ended up alone. Well except for Barbara who stepped up like a best friend should. I wish Mercy had found her happiness with Xavier and moved out of state with him. I knew eventually he would move on because he deserved to so I hope he found the happiness he deserved with Jennifer although I know Mercy still had his heart always. Tommy tried to be there for Mercy but he was on the first thing smoking at the sign of trouble in paradise so ultimately he was no good for her. I believe she died from a broken heart.
Although Judah needed to get a backbone, I don't think him going to prison was the way to get one. I felt so bad for him because I was so rooting for him to go to Morgan State. He was on the right track and it goes to show that one little mistake can change the course of your life forever. I recall watching a Monique comedy special where she did a comedy show at a women's prison and as she was telling her jokes she kept saying "we are all one bad decision away from being cellmates", and that is how this book made me feel. Luv and Dre should have never been jumping Deon, then Dre would have lived!
Deon was just a lost kid after his mom died. Although he had a loving aunt and cousin who was more like a brother, he needed his mom. I can completely understand why he was the way he was. It's sad that it took his cousin going to jail to change his life. I'm glad he did though. I did think at the beginning of the story that it would be Deon who killed Gerard/G when he grew up. That would have been a dope storyline but I'm glad Benny killed him so Deon wouldn't have had to do it. I also thought that Lenox was going to start dealing with Benny and he was going to get her hooked on drugs. I was wrong there too.
The storyline with Chanel, man oh man, how many times do brothers fall out over a woman. I just didn't understand Judah, if he loved her so much he should have kept in touch. What the hell he expected her to do. As a matter of fact it wasn't his business what she did or who she did it with after the way he acted. I realize he was in prison and didn't want her to do the time with him but he could have explained that to her and let her make the decision. Once he didn't, she was free to do what she wanted. She fell in love with Deon and I thought it was a beautiful thing. He should have let them be happy. Some may think she owes her loyalty to Judah because he got the gun from her drawer (her brother Dallas gun) but she didn't tell him to.
Overall, this was a great read and I will read more from this author.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 6, 2023
Real raw. Real emotions. Real life. That's how I'd describe Hold You Down. Two sisters Mercy and Lenox who are like night and day, close as close can be, and both raising a son are navigating their very different personalities and lives while trying to keep one another together. Their sons are basically carbon copies of their mothers with Deon being a loose cannon and fearless like Lenox, and Judah being very careful and reserved like Mercy. When Lenox makes a decision to stop the family's financial struggles she ends up in a situation she can't quite handle, and no matter how much Mercy begs her to stop Lenox doesn't see their bond as a good enough reason to listen. Deon and Judah's bond is tested many times as they grow into adulthood in a way I would never have imagined. One thing about a bond between blood though: it's deep and it's so deep that when it's broken it's like the whole world is going to feel it. Lenox felt it. Mercy felt it. Deon felt it. Judah felt it. I felt it. I found my heart racing plenty of times. I cried three times. This book is great storytelling at its best, and the characters will always have a place in my heart.
January 26, 2023
“You get high?”
“No, I get money.”
⠀
Let’s get it….💵
⠀
Tracy, Tracy, Tracy has done it again! And she didn’t come to play!
⠀
Straight laced Mercy and Firecracker Lennox are sisters raised in Harlem, NYC, raised by their grandmother. How can 2 sisters birthed to the same parents end up so completely opposite? Choices.
⠀
This multi-generational look into a family hustling and surviving during the 1980s drug game was spot on. In the background, first cousins Deon and Judah are coming of age amidst their mother’s struggles and decisions, drastically altering the course of their lives and relationship.
⠀
What a story! It was so rich, deep, and gritty, full of fleshed out characters you feel like you know personally. I loved Xavier, Judah and Mercy. I shed real tears for each of these kind souls. Anyone growing up in the ghettos (like me) during that time had some exposure to the street life, which is what made this story so authentic. I knew a few Lennox’s, Deons, Judahs and Mercys firsthand.
⠀
Lennox, Deon and one somebody else can all go to hell. I couldn’t stand them and how their poor, selfish, sinister choices devastatingly impacted those around them. I mean, they weren’t intentionally trying to hurt their loved ones, but their carelessness was a direct result.
⠀
It shows how ones’ dreams, hopes and plans can pass them by, causing them to miss out on their own life and happiness by trying to “hold everyone else down”. Uh un, get somebody else to do it…
⠀
The ending was great but I need more. I need an epilogue or a continuation Part 2!! Tracy first won me over with “White Lines” and I’m desperately waiting to see what she has next!
⠀
I listened to the audiobook and really wish I’d read the book myself. The narrator’s voice was not meant to convey the flavor of urban fiction IMHO.
“No, I get money.”
⠀
Let’s get it….💵
⠀
Tracy, Tracy, Tracy has done it again! And she didn’t come to play!
⠀
Straight laced Mercy and Firecracker Lennox are sisters raised in Harlem, NYC, raised by their grandmother. How can 2 sisters birthed to the same parents end up so completely opposite? Choices.
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This multi-generational look into a family hustling and surviving during the 1980s drug game was spot on. In the background, first cousins Deon and Judah are coming of age amidst their mother’s struggles and decisions, drastically altering the course of their lives and relationship.
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What a story! It was so rich, deep, and gritty, full of fleshed out characters you feel like you know personally. I loved Xavier, Judah and Mercy. I shed real tears for each of these kind souls. Anyone growing up in the ghettos (like me) during that time had some exposure to the street life, which is what made this story so authentic. I knew a few Lennox’s, Deons, Judahs and Mercys firsthand.
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Lennox, Deon and one somebody else can all go to hell. I couldn’t stand them and how their poor, selfish, sinister choices devastatingly impacted those around them. I mean, they weren’t intentionally trying to hurt their loved ones, but their carelessness was a direct result.
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It shows how ones’ dreams, hopes and plans can pass them by, causing them to miss out on their own life and happiness by trying to “hold everyone else down”. Uh un, get somebody else to do it…
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The ending was great but I need more. I need an epilogue or a continuation Part 2!! Tracy first won me over with “White Lines” and I’m desperately waiting to see what she has next!
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I listened to the audiobook and really wish I’d read the book myself. The narrator’s voice was not meant to convey the flavor of urban fiction IMHO.
April 29, 2024
I finished this in one sitting, I listened to it on audiobook. This was my first read from Tracy Brown & it won’t be the last. So much hurt & misunderstandings in this book took me to a place that made me think & relook at how I think & live. For Dion to not know how to cope with his heartache made him act out in the worst ways possible which lead to stress that others didn’t need, especially for Mercy who only wanted to do right by her Sister Lenox. Wow how the tables have turned for Dion & Judah.
November 9, 2022
I’m beginning to think that urban fiction is just not so much my thing anymore… I remember loving it some time ago, but IDK I just can’t get with it now…
Mercy and Lenox are sisters and BFFs, even their own kids are really close. Although so close, Mercy, and Lenox are extremely different from each other— Mercy is responsible and mature, and a motherly figure for Lenox especially now with the loss of their mother. Lenox is wild and young and looking for the next big thing that will allow her to have the luxurious life. She dreams of even if it means it’s a gamble. One night Lenox gets mixed up with a lifestyle that is fast paste and dangerous, and her decisions leads to some detrimental consequences throughout the rest of the story.
Quite frankly, I didn’t feel as if I connected to any of the characters, and I just feel like it was so full of trauma, they all need some therapy and a new start in life.
Mercy and Lenox are sisters and BFFs, even their own kids are really close. Although so close, Mercy, and Lenox are extremely different from each other— Mercy is responsible and mature, and a motherly figure for Lenox especially now with the loss of their mother. Lenox is wild and young and looking for the next big thing that will allow her to have the luxurious life. She dreams of even if it means it’s a gamble. One night Lenox gets mixed up with a lifestyle that is fast paste and dangerous, and her decisions leads to some detrimental consequences throughout the rest of the story.
Quite frankly, I didn’t feel as if I connected to any of the characters, and I just feel like it was so full of trauma, they all need some therapy and a new start in life.
March 14, 2023
This book was sooo good. If it wasn’t one thing, it was another. I felt so bad for Lennox, but she chose that lifestyle and then had to deal with the consequences. Living lavish ain’t always a good thing. Lennox really messed up Mercy and Judah’s life and Deon pissed me off throughout the book; just making stupid decisions. This book had so much drama and it was hard to put it down. The ending made me sad and I wasn’t expecting those turn of events. I need a part II, I want to know how Deon and Judah’s life is after all that transpired.
November 16, 2022
If you're an OG reader like myself, you're probably missing Street Lit. The stories that are sans rainbows and butterflies but filled with grit. The stories where they're an escape from your reality, but possibly someone else's reality. Although these stories can probably be placed on the endangered species list, the reality of the situation is, as long as Tracy Brown is around, the genre will never be dead. Hold You Down is a character driven story that takes us through the rise and fall of a Black New York family at the start of the crack epidemic. Two sisters, Lenox, and Mercy, both single mothers with sons just trying to figure this thing called life out. "All we can do is play the hand we got dealt. Ain’t no do-overs in life. The only choice we have is to keep going. Y'all are still family. Whether you like it or not."
In the 90s, grandparents played a big part in their grandkid’s lives. For most, they were practically raised by their grandparents. Things were no different for Lenox and Mercy. Their mother was pretty much a stranger to them, leaving their upbringing in the hands of their grandmother. Like most grandparents, age can get in the way of them being as attentive as they could be. Lenox and Mercy's young pregnancies were evidence of that. Both sisters bore sons, Deon, and Judah, and were left to raise them without their dads. The sisters both had different visions for their own lives and their son's lives, but the endgame was the same. To make it out of the hood. Their mindsets and their actions impacted both of their sons in very serious ways and the rollercoaster ride Tracy takes you on to experience just that is almost gut wrenching. "I love you. But me and you are like night and day."
Part two of this story is led by Deon and Judah. Readers get to experience life as young Black men growing up in Staten Island. Although you may have an inkling of what they may go through, Tracy pulls out the magnifying glass, so readers are equipped with a better look. Dealing with a family disaster isn't easy for either cousin. While Judah is more level-headed and calmer, Deon is a hot head, that's a risk to anyone that's within a 15 mile radius of him. Art imitates life in this story and the phrase "When it rains it pours." is given a new meaning in this story. With disaster after disaster happening, the title of the book Hold You Down is really put to the test. "You ain't gotta thank me, Judah. We family."
I'm not gonna lie to y'all this was a rough read. It's filled with tragedy, something most authors shy away from. There probably should be a page filled with trigger warnings at the beginning of this book, but there aren't any. Every single trigger warning would be a spoiler, and I don't know about y'all, but I did not want this story spoiled in any way. This book put the URBAN in urban fiction and it gave me nostalgia reading it. If I ever had to pick an author to make me cry, Tracy Brown would definitely be listed in my top three. If you want to read a well written book that will hurt you so good, look no further. This book will give you that and so much more. re.
In the 90s, grandparents played a big part in their grandkid’s lives. For most, they were practically raised by their grandparents. Things were no different for Lenox and Mercy. Their mother was pretty much a stranger to them, leaving their upbringing in the hands of their grandmother. Like most grandparents, age can get in the way of them being as attentive as they could be. Lenox and Mercy's young pregnancies were evidence of that. Both sisters bore sons, Deon, and Judah, and were left to raise them without their dads. The sisters both had different visions for their own lives and their son's lives, but the endgame was the same. To make it out of the hood. Their mindsets and their actions impacted both of their sons in very serious ways and the rollercoaster ride Tracy takes you on to experience just that is almost gut wrenching. "I love you. But me and you are like night and day."
Part two of this story is led by Deon and Judah. Readers get to experience life as young Black men growing up in Staten Island. Although you may have an inkling of what they may go through, Tracy pulls out the magnifying glass, so readers are equipped with a better look. Dealing with a family disaster isn't easy for either cousin. While Judah is more level-headed and calmer, Deon is a hot head, that's a risk to anyone that's within a 15 mile radius of him. Art imitates life in this story and the phrase "When it rains it pours." is given a new meaning in this story. With disaster after disaster happening, the title of the book Hold You Down is really put to the test. "You ain't gotta thank me, Judah. We family."
I'm not gonna lie to y'all this was a rough read. It's filled with tragedy, something most authors shy away from. There probably should be a page filled with trigger warnings at the beginning of this book, but there aren't any. Every single trigger warning would be a spoiler, and I don't know about y'all, but I did not want this story spoiled in any way. This book put the URBAN in urban fiction and it gave me nostalgia reading it. If I ever had to pick an author to make me cry, Tracy Brown would definitely be listed in my top three. If you want to read a well written book that will hurt you so good, look no further. This book will give you that and so much more. re.
November 2, 2022
Happy Pub day and a special THANK YOU to NetGalley for the audio version of Hold You Down in exchange for an honest review.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ FIVE STARS!!
Where do I start! Prepare to be taken on a rollercoaster for this urban story about the relationship between sisters Mercy & Lenox and their sons Judah and Deon. Told in two parts throughout the years in varying perspectives between Mercy and Lenox and then Judah and Deon you can't help but be engulfed. I couldn't finish this quick enough.
Set in NY in the early 90s, the sisters are best friends and raising their sons each as single moms. Throughout the story you are taken on a journey of each sister's life and experiences through the crack epidemic, life in the projects and raising their boys + the boy's lives and how those choices impact who they become.
From the point of view of each character, their struggles of life, loss, survival, love and how your family can mold who they become and the lives they lead. This was my first time reading a book by Tracy Brown and won't be my last. The audio also gave a full grasp of the emotions and different character arcs that were crucial to the experience. I found myself laughing out loud and crying (sobbing) through different parts of the book.
I was left with a full story that came to completion. This prompted many thoughts and reflection on my own personal experiences and friends and I loved every minute.
TW: drugs, grief, rape & some violence
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ FIVE STARS!!
Where do I start! Prepare to be taken on a rollercoaster for this urban story about the relationship between sisters Mercy & Lenox and their sons Judah and Deon. Told in two parts throughout the years in varying perspectives between Mercy and Lenox and then Judah and Deon you can't help but be engulfed. I couldn't finish this quick enough.
Set in NY in the early 90s, the sisters are best friends and raising their sons each as single moms. Throughout the story you are taken on a journey of each sister's life and experiences through the crack epidemic, life in the projects and raising their boys + the boy's lives and how those choices impact who they become.
From the point of view of each character, their struggles of life, loss, survival, love and how your family can mold who they become and the lives they lead. This was my first time reading a book by Tracy Brown and won't be my last. The audio also gave a full grasp of the emotions and different character arcs that were crucial to the experience. I found myself laughing out loud and crying (sobbing) through different parts of the book.
I was left with a full story that came to completion. This prompted many thoughts and reflection on my own personal experiences and friends and I loved every minute.
TW: drugs, grief, rape & some violence
April 27, 2023
This book bored me to tears. It was predictable and uneventful. There was a level of curiosity that kept me reading, and the feelings of the characters through their turmoil was well written, but overall I did not enjoy this book.
November 19, 2023
Every other chapter, I was saying, "Damn". I don't have the words for a real review. I wish there was a follow-up on Deon and Judah.
July 8, 2024
I’ll be back with a review. This book really did me in.
Tracy will pull every emotion out of you that you probably try to shut away. This story turned me every way but loose. However, this book is also a good think peace and maybe even a reflection into ones life. A lot of things in this book literally held this character’s down with their choices. That was the label for one of my tabs because that’s basically what this book is about. My heart was truly broken.
-Judah told Deon the very much needed truth at the end. Something he and his mother should have heard a long time ago. It was facts.
-Judah was so close. However, I’m super proud he left. He broke that cycle which was something his mom could never do.
-Mercy literally let her family destroy her. She should have bet on herself and that man for her happiness. Clearly Lenox was only for her.
-Xavier deserves his flowers. Also liked the topic about black boys/men with their feelings being brought up.
-I felt for Deon but once again those choices caused the people that loved him a lot of hurt.
-Chanel was my girl but then out of the people and all the time that went by you go out dirty. At least Nia and Keisha knew what kind of girls they were.
I know a lot of us did not care for Judah’s turn of events but this literally happens too much in these settings. The choices we make, the things we allow and when we do not bet on our selfs we could lose it all. Family or not it’s okay to be peaceful and happy. If that means leaving them behind, cutting off or whatever then do that. No one is responsible for your happiness but you. Do not let this world and these people break you. If you have the choice the option to be better then do that. You only get one. Make it count.
P. S. Chanel should have got that ass tapped. When her truth was revealed I was truly disgusted by her.
Tracy will pull every emotion out of you that you probably try to shut away. This story turned me every way but loose. However, this book is also a good think peace and maybe even a reflection into ones life. A lot of things in this book literally held this character’s down with their choices. That was the label for one of my tabs because that’s basically what this book is about. My heart was truly broken.
-Judah told Deon the very much needed truth at the end. Something he and his mother should have heard a long time ago. It was facts.
-Judah was so close. However, I’m super proud he left. He broke that cycle which was something his mom could never do.
-Mercy literally let her family destroy her. She should have bet on herself and that man for her happiness. Clearly Lenox was only for her.
-Xavier deserves his flowers. Also liked the topic about black boys/men with their feelings being brought up.
-I felt for Deon but once again those choices caused the people that loved him a lot of hurt.
-Chanel was my girl but then out of the people and all the time that went by you go out dirty. At least Nia and Keisha knew what kind of girls they were.
I know a lot of us did not care for Judah’s turn of events but this literally happens too much in these settings. The choices we make, the things we allow and when we do not bet on our selfs we could lose it all. Family or not it’s okay to be peaceful and happy. If that means leaving them behind, cutting off or whatever then do that. No one is responsible for your happiness but you. Do not let this world and these people break you. If you have the choice the option to be better then do that. You only get one. Make it count.
P. S. Chanel should have got that ass tapped. When her truth was revealed I was truly disgusted by her.
October 19, 2022
This book made me cry, which is unusual. Few books move me to that extent, but this book had me weeping several times -- and holding my throat in anticipatory horror as I watched bad events coming like a slow freight train inexorably bearing down. So if you like to feel all the feels, I recommend this novel.
The story focuses on two sisters and then later on their two sons, who grow up close as brothers. I'm white and most of the books I read all my life were by white women, so I love when I read books by non-white authors that give me a glimpse into the homes and hearts of people from another culture. These two Black sisters and their two Black sons live in Black communities, mostly go to Black schools and date Black people, so I felt I was getting a good look at lower-middle-class Black culture. And the best part is that none of that mattered, because I simply felt the authentic richness of each character and their individual motivations. Patrice Williams did the excellent narration in a variety of voices on the advanced reader copy audio book I was gifted by Netgalley and Macmillan Audio.
I can't say much more about the story without giving anything away, but I will say that I could hardly breathe for the sense of terrible dread that hung over me as I read through this novel, which really hammered home how horribly hard it is to raise young black men in this society. My heart ached. I would highly recommend this book.
The story focuses on two sisters and then later on their two sons, who grow up close as brothers. I'm white and most of the books I read all my life were by white women, so I love when I read books by non-white authors that give me a glimpse into the homes and hearts of people from another culture. These two Black sisters and their two Black sons live in Black communities, mostly go to Black schools and date Black people, so I felt I was getting a good look at lower-middle-class Black culture. And the best part is that none of that mattered, because I simply felt the authentic richness of each character and their individual motivations. Patrice Williams did the excellent narration in a variety of voices on the advanced reader copy audio book I was gifted by Netgalley and Macmillan Audio.
I can't say much more about the story without giving anything away, but I will say that I could hardly breathe for the sense of terrible dread that hung over me as I read through this novel, which really hammered home how horribly hard it is to raise young black men in this society. My heart ached. I would highly recommend this book.
November 7, 2022
I have a lot to say about this book! I loved it and was riveted by both the audio and ebook which I rotated through.
Sisters Lex and Mercy live in New York (Harlem then Staten Island). Their lives go down different paths as Lex enters the drug game and Mercy stays on the straight and narrow. The backdrop is 1980s New York with all its glitz, glamour, crime and edge. Their sons, Judah and Deon, are exposed to the lives and the decisions they’ve made, good and bad. The second half of the book then follows the boys as they grow up, find themselves entangled in similar good or bad decisions and come to terms with their roles in life and as a family.
I was immediately taken by this gritty and gut wrenching drama. I loved each character and their development. The women were complex as were the circumstances of their lives. The second part of the book that follows the sons is equally heartbreaking in new ways. The peak into these lives was important and I’m glad to have read this book; this is likely to be a favorite of the month (Sept) for me. I also think this could be an excellent book club pick! I personally would love to talk about it with others so let me know if you’ve read it or plan to.
Sisters Lex and Mercy live in New York (Harlem then Staten Island). Their lives go down different paths as Lex enters the drug game and Mercy stays on the straight and narrow. The backdrop is 1980s New York with all its glitz, glamour, crime and edge. Their sons, Judah and Deon, are exposed to the lives and the decisions they’ve made, good and bad. The second half of the book then follows the boys as they grow up, find themselves entangled in similar good or bad decisions and come to terms with their roles in life and as a family.
I was immediately taken by this gritty and gut wrenching drama. I loved each character and their development. The women were complex as were the circumstances of their lives. The second part of the book that follows the sons is equally heartbreaking in new ways. The peak into these lives was important and I’m glad to have read this book; this is likely to be a favorite of the month (Sept) for me. I also think this could be an excellent book club pick! I personally would love to talk about it with others so let me know if you’ve read it or plan to.
December 13, 2022
Read at your own risk. I’ve never cried so much reading a book in my life. I think I need counseling 😭
September 12, 2024
A coming of age story of loss and recovery. Excellent through and through!!!
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