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Artificial Intimacy: Virtual Friends, Digital Lovers, and Algorithmic Matchmakers
What happens when the human brain, which evolved over eons, collides with twenty-first-century technology? Machines can now push psychological buttons, stimulating and sometimes exploiting the ways people make friends, gossip with neighbors, and grow intimate with lovers. Sex robots present the humanoid face of this technological revolution--yet although it is easy to gawk at their uncanniness, more familiar technologies based in artificial intelligence and virtual reality are insinuating themselves into human interactions. Digital lovers, virtual friends, and algorithmic matchmakers help us manage our feelings in a world of cognitive overload. Will these machines, fueled by masses of user data and powered by algorithms that learn all the time, transform the quality of human life?
Artificial Intimacy offers an innovative perspective on the possibilities of the present and near future. The evolutionary biologist Rob Brooks explores the latest research on intimacy and desire to consider the interaction of new technologies and fundamental human behaviors. He details how existing artificial intelligences can already learn and exploit human social needs--and are getting better at what they do. Brooks combines an understanding of core human traits from evolutionary biology with analysis of how cultural, economic, and technological contexts shape the ways people express them. Beyond the technology, he asks what the implications of artificial intimacy will be for how we understand ourselves.
Artificial Intimacy offers an innovative perspective on the possibilities of the present and near future. The evolutionary biologist Rob Brooks explores the latest research on intimacy and desire to consider the interaction of new technologies and fundamental human behaviors. He details how existing artificial intelligences can already learn and exploit human social needs--and are getting better at what they do. Brooks combines an understanding of core human traits from evolutionary biology with analysis of how cultural, economic, and technological contexts shape the ways people express them. Beyond the technology, he asks what the implications of artificial intimacy will be for how we understand ourselves.
304 pages, Hardcover
Published September 7, 2021
About the author
Rob Brooks
2 books8 followersROB BROOKS is an evolutionary biologist whose expertise concerns the conflicting evolutionary interests that make sex sizzle and render reproduction complex. Born and educated in South Africa, with BSc(Hons) and Ph.D. from the University of the Witwatersrand, he moved to Australia in 1997 to work at James Cook University, Townsville.
He is Scientia Professor of Evolution at UNSW, Sydney, where he founded and directed the Evolution and Ecology Research Centre, and established the UNSW Grand Challenges Program.
His first book, Sex, Genes and Rock ’n’ Roll: How evolution has shaped the modern world (2011), won the Queensland Literary Award for Science Writing. He also won Australia’s most prestigious award for science communication, the Eureka Prize in 2013.
His second book, Artificial Intimacy: Virtual Friends, Digital Lovers and Algorithmic Matchmakers is to be published in 2021.
He is Scientia Professor of Evolution at UNSW, Sydney, where he founded and directed the Evolution and Ecology Research Centre, and established the UNSW Grand Challenges Program.
His first book, Sex, Genes and Rock ’n’ Roll: How evolution has shaped the modern world (2011), won the Queensland Literary Award for Science Writing. He also won Australia’s most prestigious award for science communication, the Eureka Prize in 2013.
His second book, Artificial Intimacy: Virtual Friends, Digital Lovers and Algorithmic Matchmakers is to be published in 2021.
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
June 22, 2021
This book is not only about machine learning and artificial intelligence; it gives us an in-depth analysis of our society and how different events from the past have shaped our lives. The author explains social dynamics throughout history and how recent events have dramatically changed the way we interact with one another. At times it may seem as if the focus has shifted, but I can assure you that everything he explains has a specific reason.
I found this book particularly interesting as I work with machine learning everyday. It is somewhat stunning to see the social consequences this technology has in the makeup of our society and the possible future repercussions. I liked that the author didn't have a particular bias against or pro the technology in itself but showed both sides of the argument that experts are having today regarding the application of these "artificial intimacies".
The future may not be set in stone but we are surely going to see a lot of machine learning and artificial intelligence in our everyday lives (as we already do) so I find it very useful to know more about it. That's the reason why I absolutely recommend this book.
I found this book particularly interesting as I work with machine learning everyday. It is somewhat stunning to see the social consequences this technology has in the makeup of our society and the possible future repercussions. I liked that the author didn't have a particular bias against or pro the technology in itself but showed both sides of the argument that experts are having today regarding the application of these "artificial intimacies".
The future may not be set in stone but we are surely going to see a lot of machine learning and artificial intelligence in our everyday lives (as we already do) so I find it very useful to know more about it. That's the reason why I absolutely recommend this book.
December 12, 2021
This was such an unexpectedly fantastic book. When I first heard about it, I wasn’t too excited about it, but the author was kind enough to offer a review copy. Before reading it, and even in the beginning of the book, I was like, “Alright. This is just going to be a book about sex robots,” but it was so much more than that. Rob Brooks takes a look at the direction of relationships as technology advances. Yes, there’s some stuff about the future of sex robots and what that means for society, but I loved the philosophical look and deep questions this book asks in all sorts of different topics. Brooks dives into algorithms and AI that can simulate human affection and what this might mean for lonely people. He brings up really interesting topics about how AI may have positive or negative affects on people who are sexually violent or how it might decrease violence and anger from incels. There were so many topics from this book that never crossed my mind, and I absolutely loved it and definitely recommend you check it out.
May 23, 2021
Strong improvement in writing and original research compared to the first book. Offers strong insight into the future potential of artificial intelligence to provide artificial intimacies to humans and the impact this would have on human relationships as a result.
Brooks predicts that a series of intimacies rather than one singular lover packaged in a robot or doll form will come to
Brooks predicts that a series of intimacies rather than one singular lover packaged in a robot or doll form will come to
May 25, 2021
3.5 stars.
Technological advancement inevitably changes human and social relationships, and both hopeful and skeptical speculation is rising around it. This book provides an interesting look at how artificial intimacy (AI) could potentially change the way we establish and maintain interpersonal relationships.
It is clearly a well-researched and thought out book. The writing is intellectual and approachable! Fascinating concepts like grooming, gender inequality and sexual conflicts are introduced and explained in depth in an easy-to-understand manner.
Yet, the scope of AI tech covered is quite narrow. While there're some exploration on matchmaking apps and virtual friends, the book mainly revolves around sex robots. I was hoping for discussions on a wider range of possible AI applications. The book also largely focuses on the needs and wants of men. For example, with all the analysis on how sex robots can be used to defuse anger of InCel, there's no (or little) mention of what they can do for women.👀
All in all, I'd still recommend this book as it offers a valuable sex-positive conversation.
Technological advancement inevitably changes human and social relationships, and both hopeful and skeptical speculation is rising around it. This book provides an interesting look at how artificial intimacy (AI) could potentially change the way we establish and maintain interpersonal relationships.
It is clearly a well-researched and thought out book. The writing is intellectual and approachable! Fascinating concepts like grooming, gender inequality and sexual conflicts are introduced and explained in depth in an easy-to-understand manner.
Yet, the scope of AI tech covered is quite narrow. While there're some exploration on matchmaking apps and virtual friends, the book mainly revolves around sex robots. I was hoping for discussions on a wider range of possible AI applications. The book also largely focuses on the needs and wants of men. For example, with all the analysis on how sex robots can be used to defuse anger of InCel, there's no (or little) mention of what they can do for women.👀
All in all, I'd still recommend this book as it offers a valuable sex-positive conversation.
August 19, 2021
What's an artificial intimacy? Well, there are three types that partially overlap: digital lovers, matchmakers, and virtual friends. All of which are evolving rapidly and have fundamentally changed how we meet people, satisfy our sexual urges, and look for romantic partners. Rob takes a deep dive into these technologies associated with artificial intimacies (sex dollbot, social media, etc) through an evolutionary perspective, and in the process writes an absolute gem of a book. I read a lot books on human origins and human evolution. What I love about Rob's book is his immense knowledge in his discipline of expertise, evolutionary biology--and the origins of human nature more broadly--but also how to use these insights to better prepare us for the challenges and opportunities in the near future. Lucid, accessible, insightful, and incredibly illuminating.
July 27, 2021
This is a book about sex, and despite the title, not just sex in the age of the internet. Author Rob Brooks is a Professor of Evolution at the University of New South Wales, and puts sexual conduct today in the context of the whole human story. Technology, he argues, has always impacted sexuality "because new technologies changed how women and men make their livings and thus how they relate to one another," whether that is taming animals, industrialization, or the contraceptive pill.
The book begins with a chapter on "artificial intimacies," such as sex robots or online chatbots. "They will likely transform the quality of human life," he writes, perhaps with a bit of exaggeration, but he is never one to understate his case. His writing style is light and infused with dry humour, so the pages turn quickly as we explore everything from internet dating to the mating habits of bonobos and chimpanzees. We learn that the male of a species evolve large testicles if "females mate with many males in close succession," to improve their chances of impregnation. Then we move to artificial intelligence, Robin Dunbar's rules about the number of friends humans tend to have, social media, dating sims, sexually cannibalistic insects, romance fraud on the internet, deepfake images, cyberstalking, discussion of whether easily available pornography increases rape - it does not, apparently, being more likely to diminish it, but it may have a negative effect on long-term relationships - and much more.
Another section I found fascinating was about polygyny, when men have more than one wife. "Every time a man takes an extra wife, another man, probably young and poor, is rendered unable to find one," Brooks explains. The consequence is that "radicalisation and violence follow closely behind." Brooks links this, along with a related tradition of a bride price, to the Boko Haram insurgency in northern Nigeria. The negative impact of numeric imbalance between the sexes is also cause for concern in China and north-west India, thanks to "historic preferences for sons over daughters." There is a long discussion of the impact of InCel – involuntary celibacy – especially on young males. Can artificial intimacy make society safer by curbing the rage of InCels? It could go either way, Brooks remarks.
I picked up this book in the hope of learning more about how technology is impacting human relationships. In that respect, the book delivers, though I also found it somewhat breathless, with a tendency to jump about between topics. I did enjoy the author's concluding chapter, where he argues that artificial intimacy should be allowed to develop "with some openness and freedom", as it "is more likely to ease than add to sexual suppression, reproductive coercion and top-down social control." He does see dangers though, including from moralists, conservatives, and control by tech giants such as Google, Facebook and Apple.
Recommended, though I would have liked a slower pace and sharper focus.
Thanks to NetGalley and the Publisher for an early review copy.
The book begins with a chapter on "artificial intimacies," such as sex robots or online chatbots. "They will likely transform the quality of human life," he writes, perhaps with a bit of exaggeration, but he is never one to understate his case. His writing style is light and infused with dry humour, so the pages turn quickly as we explore everything from internet dating to the mating habits of bonobos and chimpanzees. We learn that the male of a species evolve large testicles if "females mate with many males in close succession," to improve their chances of impregnation. Then we move to artificial intelligence, Robin Dunbar's rules about the number of friends humans tend to have, social media, dating sims, sexually cannibalistic insects, romance fraud on the internet, deepfake images, cyberstalking, discussion of whether easily available pornography increases rape - it does not, apparently, being more likely to diminish it, but it may have a negative effect on long-term relationships - and much more.
Another section I found fascinating was about polygyny, when men have more than one wife. "Every time a man takes an extra wife, another man, probably young and poor, is rendered unable to find one," Brooks explains. The consequence is that "radicalisation and violence follow closely behind." Brooks links this, along with a related tradition of a bride price, to the Boko Haram insurgency in northern Nigeria. The negative impact of numeric imbalance between the sexes is also cause for concern in China and north-west India, thanks to "historic preferences for sons over daughters." There is a long discussion of the impact of InCel – involuntary celibacy – especially on young males. Can artificial intimacy make society safer by curbing the rage of InCels? It could go either way, Brooks remarks.
I picked up this book in the hope of learning more about how technology is impacting human relationships. In that respect, the book delivers, though I also found it somewhat breathless, with a tendency to jump about between topics. I did enjoy the author's concluding chapter, where he argues that artificial intimacy should be allowed to develop "with some openness and freedom", as it "is more likely to ease than add to sexual suppression, reproductive coercion and top-down social control." He does see dangers though, including from moralists, conservatives, and control by tech giants such as Google, Facebook and Apple.
Recommended, though I would have liked a slower pace and sharper focus.
Thanks to NetGalley and the Publisher for an early review copy.
July 31, 2021
Contained some food for thought. There was a lot of emphasis on the fact that human beings have limited social capacity at a time, and that substitutes like social media actually use those capacities as well. This point was expanded further with how different future and already present technology could affect it, highlighting not only the rather obvious downsides but also possible advantages. Although at its core it seems like a simple truth, i personally hadn't pondered on it nearly enough, so from this aspect i found the discussion insightful. Sometimes the read got a bit repetitive, though.
Surprisingly (or maybe not, if you really think about the subject matter!) a substantial part of this book actually focuses on different examples from past and present how societies function in regards to intimacy and sex. While sometimes it added to the arguments, there were times when the different passages didn't connect as smoothly to me.
The passage where different future realities or rather dystopias were presented drawing from different pop culture works (The Handmaiden's Tale and the movie Her, to name a couple) was a pretty refreshing part in the latter stages of the book.
Ultimately a fairly cumulative look on the future prospects of artificial intimacy, and their good & bad, and, of course, grey sides! Also offers a couple of good points about machine learning, data privacy, sexual conflicts and sociology.
Written in an approachable manner, it was an easy-going read.
Surprisingly (or maybe not, if you really think about the subject matter!) a substantial part of this book actually focuses on different examples from past and present how societies function in regards to intimacy and sex. While sometimes it added to the arguments, there were times when the different passages didn't connect as smoothly to me.
The passage where different future realities or rather dystopias were presented drawing from different pop culture works (The Handmaiden's Tale and the movie Her, to name a couple) was a pretty refreshing part in the latter stages of the book.
Ultimately a fairly cumulative look on the future prospects of artificial intimacy, and their good & bad, and, of course, grey sides! Also offers a couple of good points about machine learning, data privacy, sexual conflicts and sociology.
Written in an approachable manner, it was an easy-going read.
August 2, 2021
In the words of the great Futurama educational film, "Don't Date Robots!" Brooks' "Artificial Intimacy" is an approachable text that deals with the advances and perceived future of where a different form of the titular AI is developing based off historical trends and dynamics. From there, topics such as porn, Boko Haram, incels, and of course sex robots are discussed with what we might expect as technology continues evolve, especially on the sex robot front. Brooks already anticipates Futurama's film strips concern with sex robots to become an actual conservative moral panic once they become more widespread and affordable.
An interesting read for those interested in the technology of pleasure. I would have enjoyed a dive into the information security nightmare that contemporary teledildonics is (as catalogued in the beautifully named Internet Of Dongs blog), but that is my personal InfoSec preference showing.
An interesting read for those interested in the technology of pleasure. I would have enjoyed a dive into the information security nightmare that contemporary teledildonics is (as catalogued in the beautifully named Internet Of Dongs blog), but that is my personal InfoSec preference showing.
September 12, 2021
This was not the book I'd hoped for - but a very interesting look, from a point of view I wasn't familiar with. Having an AI as a friend or lover is something the movies seem to suggest is "Coming Soon!", but in reality, the way that we react and interact with AI is still in its infancy.
This book shows how AI might learn, and what we humans have done in the past to make it possible that we will treat even the basic AI things (like ELIZA, if you remember that program) as "human", and where this might lead us, friendship-wise and romantically.
A good read - a bit technical on things human and how we react, but still very approachable.
This book shows how AI might learn, and what we humans have done in the past to make it possible that we will treat even the basic AI things (like ELIZA, if you remember that program) as "human", and where this might lead us, friendship-wise and romantically.
A good read - a bit technical on things human and how we react, but still very approachable.
July 21, 2022
This is the kind of subject that fascinates me. Excellent book.
August 30, 2021
I wasn't sure whether this read was going to be some dry academic tome. But on page 4 when Rob Brooks drops the f bomb I knew he was down with the tech and intimately knew (or wanted to know); his subject. With impressive research, he glides in and out of a disparate or rather desperate tech industry, all trying to entice us humans to jump into bed with our future "companions". It's an easy read that challenges notions of intimacy, and definitely whets our appetites to understand a burgeoning culture that promises to appease our desires. These desires Rob contends, are nothing new, but will machines be able to fulfil them? Well, that's what you may want to find out...
July 18, 2021
Thought-provoking sociology on how technology is likely to influence our human relationships. Don't expect a clear, tidy story, but lots of interesting ideas to discuss around the dinner table. I appreciated his evolutionary psychology perspective (even if I didn't wholly agree with every conclusion).
April 13, 2022
This would have a higher rating if I felt the book was more focused and possibly if it wasn't even called Artificial Intimacy.
Fom the start, Brooks assures us this is not about Artificial Intelligence, it's about Artificial Intimacy. That's good because it could easily be confusing; possibly thought to be an Artificial Intelligence book with a catchy title, discussing a subsection of Artificial Intelligence. But no. we are talking about intimacy in the digital, virtual and artificial world.
That's cool and I'm into that.
The problem is that Brooks, with is background as an evolutionary biologist, spends ages talking about plenty of other things other than Artificial Intimacy. Like the mating habits of bonobos or the differences in marriage rituals between certain human tribes or how humans have developed different ideas about modern love. Many of these are given some hand-wavey relationship towards digital/artificial intelligence as in "this is important because if there was an app about artificial intelligence it would have to mirror this" or some such.
If we have a book about artificial intimacy, tell us about the app, don't spend a chapter or two comparing different animals and their mating details in painstakingdetails and then some catch all blithe statement about how this kinda has to do with artificial intimacy. Sorta. It really needs to be the other way round.
That's not to say that I didn't find some of those details interesting, but I felt the book had the wrong focus for its stated aims.
There WERE some good bits about artificial intimacy however a lot of these seemed more anecdotal than analytical.
I also felt I was reading a lot about modern trends in love and searching through a lot of info to find the tenuous connections to artificial intimacy.
On the plus side, this is a very recent book which does include things like how Covid has affected artificial intimacy. A lot of writing hasn't started to tackle these sorts of topics yet.
Fom the start, Brooks assures us this is not about Artificial Intelligence, it's about Artificial Intimacy. That's good because it could easily be confusing; possibly thought to be an Artificial Intelligence book with a catchy title, discussing a subsection of Artificial Intelligence. But no. we are talking about intimacy in the digital, virtual and artificial world.
That's cool and I'm into that.
The problem is that Brooks, with is background as an evolutionary biologist, spends ages talking about plenty of other things other than Artificial Intimacy. Like the mating habits of bonobos or the differences in marriage rituals between certain human tribes or how humans have developed different ideas about modern love. Many of these are given some hand-wavey relationship towards digital/artificial intelligence as in "this is important because if there was an app about artificial intelligence it would have to mirror this" or some such.
If we have a book about artificial intimacy, tell us about the app, don't spend a chapter or two comparing different animals and their mating details in painstakingdetails and then some catch all blithe statement about how this kinda has to do with artificial intimacy. Sorta. It really needs to be the other way round.
That's not to say that I didn't find some of those details interesting, but I felt the book had the wrong focus for its stated aims.
There WERE some good bits about artificial intimacy however a lot of these seemed more anecdotal than analytical.
I also felt I was reading a lot about modern trends in love and searching through a lot of info to find the tenuous connections to artificial intimacy.
On the plus side, this is a very recent book which does include things like how Covid has affected artificial intimacy. A lot of writing hasn't started to tackle these sorts of topics yet.
May 27, 2021
Thanks to Edelweiss and the publisher for allowing me to review this book early. Rating and review are my own.
This was a book explores intimacy in the digital and technological age and speculation on how it could evolve. With throw backs to our own evolution of intimacy and relationship and research on current technology, the author paints a picture of where we came from and where we might be going with what we have now.
The book interesting and not a bad read, but I think I would have liked something more from it. I think I would have like a little more far-reaching speculation or a little less focus on the sex robots as I feel there is a lot more to cover. It does go over some other technologies and apps, but those feel less focused on. Over all, the book is a good read and recommend to anyone who is interested in the subject of virtual intimacy.
Now where is my sex robot? Jkjk…unless?
This was a book explores intimacy in the digital and technological age and speculation on how it could evolve. With throw backs to our own evolution of intimacy and relationship and research on current technology, the author paints a picture of where we came from and where we might be going with what we have now.
The book interesting and not a bad read, but I think I would have liked something more from it. I think I would have like a little more far-reaching speculation or a little less focus on the sex robots as I feel there is a lot more to cover. It does go over some other technologies and apps, but those feel less focused on. Over all, the book is a good read and recommend to anyone who is interested in the subject of virtual intimacy.
Now where is my sex robot? Jkjk…unless?
Shelved as '0-not-to-read-or-did-not-finish'
April 28, 2022This book was referenced in the following article:
https://harpers.org/archive/2022/05/g...
"While I ate, I leafed through my notes in another book, Artificial Intimacy: Virtual Friends, Digital Lovers, and Algorithmic Matchmakers by Rob Brooks. An evolutionary biologist and professor at the University of New South Wales, Brooks delves into the implications of current and future sex and intimacy tech, and while he’s no Luddite, it’s not always a pretty picture. The best sections of this perceptive and balanced study track how algorithms mimic our natural allogrooming tendencies. “The secrets of grooming and establishing intimacy, uncovered first by science but then more extensively by machine learning,” he writes, “are likely to be too powerful a means of capturing our attention for platforms to resist.”"
https://harpers.org/archive/2022/05/g...
"While I ate, I leafed through my notes in another book, Artificial Intimacy: Virtual Friends, Digital Lovers, and Algorithmic Matchmakers by Rob Brooks. An evolutionary biologist and professor at the University of New South Wales, Brooks delves into the implications of current and future sex and intimacy tech, and while he’s no Luddite, it’s not always a pretty picture. The best sections of this perceptive and balanced study track how algorithms mimic our natural allogrooming tendencies. “The secrets of grooming and establishing intimacy, uncovered first by science but then more extensively by machine learning,” he writes, “are likely to be too powerful a means of capturing our attention for platforms to resist.”"
March 2, 2022
I learned a lot but i think the title was misleading. I would have liked to have read this book with the same title and premise from a technologist or intimacy expert. This doesn’t mean that the author didn’t have relevant expertise, it’s just a different book from what I was looking for.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews