Dad Jokes Quotes
Quotes tagged as "dad-jokes"
Showing 1-14 of 14
“There's no such thing as a superhuman. But the only thing I got to tell you, if you take a dog and kick him around he's got to be alert, he's got to be more sharper than you. Well, we've been kicked around for two thousand years. We're not more smarter, we're more alert.”
― Barney's Version
― Barney's Version
“The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza store... and says, "Can you make me one with everything?”
― Gags and Extracts
― Gags and Extracts
“A man has been stealing wheels off of police cars. They are working tirelessly to catch him.”
― Gags and Extracts
― Gags and Extracts
“I just got a job helping a one-armed typist do capital letters. It's shift work.”
― Gags and Extracts
― Gags and Extracts
“And Tumble would roll her eyes, because honestly, her dad need some new jokes.”
― Tumble & Blue
― Tumble & Blue
“Wit has truth in it. Wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words - Dorothy Parker
I do whatever it is that's in the third category she fails to mention - Seth Goldberg”
―
I do whatever it is that's in the third category she fails to mention - Seth Goldberg”
―
“If ever there was a perfectly bad time to bring out a perfectly bad Dad joke, this was it.”
― Harp and the Lyre: Exposed
― Harp and the Lyre: Exposed
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