Three to Get Deadly Quotes

“I make lots of mistakes. I try hard not to make the same mistake more than three or four times.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Maybe next time we just open the door and start out with some bitch slapping.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Ranger is an unusual name," she managed. "Is it a nickname?"
It's a street name," Ranger said. "I was a Ranger in the army."
I heard about them Rangers on TV," Grandma said. "I heard they get dogs pregnant."
My father's mouth dropped open and a piece of ham fell out.
My mother froze, her fork poised in midair.
That's sort of a joke," I told Grandma. "Rangers don't get dogs pregnant in real life."
I looked at Ranger for corroboration and got another smile.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Its always nice to have a stud muffin at the table.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“To celebrate our partnership I dressed up like Ranger. Black boots, black jeans, black turtleneck, small silver hoop earrings.
He gave me the once-over when I opened the door to him.
‘Smart ass,’ he said.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Adaptation is one of the great advantages to being born and bred in Jersey. We're simply not bested by bad air or tainted water. We're like that catfish with lungs. Take us out of our environment and we can grow whatever body parts we need to survive. After Jersey the rest of the country's a piece of cake. You want to send someone into a fallout zone? Get him from Jersey. He'll be fine.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I took the stool next to him, raising an eyebrow at the coffee and cruller on the counter. "Thought you weren't into internal pollution," I said. Lately Ranger'd been on a health food thing.

"Props," Ranger told me. "Didn't want to look out of place."

I didn't want to burst his fantasy bubble, but the only time Ranger wouldn't look out of place would be standing in a lineup between Rambo and Batman.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Exercise improves your sex life.
Ranger to Stephanie”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Ranger declined the butterscotch pudding, not wanting to disrupt the consistency of his blood sugar level. I had two puddings and coffee, choosing to keep my pancreas at peak performance. Use it or lose it is my philosophy.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“[Stephanie] "This won't be so bad," I said to her, making an effort at convincing myself. "How about your blanket? We could wrap him up in the blanket. Then we could pick him up without actually touching him."

"I suppose that'd be all right," Lula said. "We could give it a try"

I spread the blanket on the ground beside Elliot Harp, took a deep breath, hooked my fingers around his belt and rolled him onto the blanket. I jumped back, squeezed my eyes closed tight and exhaled. No matter how much violent death I saw, I would never get used to it. "I'm gonna definitely have the runs," Lula said. "I can feel it coming on."

"Forget about the runs and help me with this body!" Lula grabbed hold of the head end of the blanket, and I grabbed hold of the foot end. Harp had full rigor and wouldn't bend, so we put him in the trunk headfirst with his legs sticking out. We carefully closed the lid on Harp's knees and secured the lid with a piece of rope Lula had in her trunk.

"Hold on," Lula said, pulling a red flowered scarf from her coat pocket, tying the scarf on Harp's foot like a flag. "Don't want to get a ticket. I hear the police are real picky about having things sticking out of your trunk."

Especially dead guys.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Are you telling me you think Ranger's a superhero?'
Think about it. We don't know where he lives. We don't know anything about him.'
Superheroes are make-believe.'
Oh yeah?' Lula said. 'What about God?”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I checked my pocketbook to make sure I had the essentials... beeper, tissues, hair spray, flashlight, cuffs, lipstick, gun with bullets, recharged cell phone, recharged stun gun, hairbrush, gum, pepper spray, nail file. Was I a kick-ass bounty hunter, or what?"(Three to get deadly)Janet evanovich”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“When I was a little girl I wanted to be a reindeer-the flying kind. I spent a couple years galloping around looking for lichen and fantasizing about boy reindeer. Then one day I saw Peter Pan and my reindeer phase was over. I didn't understand the allure of not growing up, because every little girl got boobs and go steady. I did understand that a flying Peter Pan was better than a flying reindeer. Mary Lou had seen Peter Pan too, but Mary Lou's ambition was to be Wendy, so Mary Lou and I made a good pair. On most any day we could be seen holding hands, running through the neighborhood singing, "I can fly! I can fly!" If we'd been older this probably would have started rumors.
The Peter Pan stage was actually pretty short-lived because a few months into Peter Pan I discovered Wonder Woman. Wonder Woman couldn't fly, but she had big, fat bulging boobs crammed into a sexy Wondersuit. Barbie was firmly entrenched as role model in the burg, but Wonder Woman gave her a good run for her money. Not only did Wonder Woman spill over her Wondercups but she also kicked serious ass. If I had to name the single most influential person in my life it would have to be Wonder Woman.
All during my teens and early twenties I wanted to be a rock star. The fact that I can't play a musical instrument or carry a tune did nothing to diminish the fantasy. During my more realistic moments I wanted to be a rock star's girlfriend.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“...I blink back the threat of tears, swiped at my nose and narrowed my eyes. "Listen to me, you two bags of monkey shit, "I yelled. "I am not in a good mood. My car keeps stalling. The day before yesterday I threw up on Joe Morelli. I was called a fat cow by my ex-husband. And if that isn't enough...my hair is ORANGE! ORANGE, FOR CHRISSAKE! And now you have the gall to force yourself into my home and threaten my hamster. Well, you have gone too far. You have crossed the line!”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“There's a small possibility that I might be a murder suspect"
Stephanie”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“When something needs to be ironed I put it in the ironing basket. If a year goes by and the item is still in the basket I throw the item away. This is a good system since eventually I end up only with clothes that don’t need ironing.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I got out of the elevator and confronted Mr. Wexler. “Killing is wrong.”

“We kill chickens,” Mr. Wexler said. “We kill cows. We kill trees. So big deal, we kill some drug dealers.”

It was hard to argue with that kind of logic because I like cows and chickens and trees much better than drug dealers.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I rolled my eyes so far into the top of my head I almost fell over backward.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“A woman's never too old to make an idiot of herself. It goes along with equality of the sexes and potty parity.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“My sex life is okay."

"Yeah," Morelli said. "But sometimes it's fun to have a partner.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“You should see me work my magic in leather"
Ranger”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I exchanged my flannel shirt for a Rangers jersey and zapped the television on. Probably I should make more phone calls, but the Rangers were playing and priorities were priorities.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I may not be the most patient woman in the world, or the most glamorous, or the most athletic, but I'm right up there at the top of the line when it comes to resiliency.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“You can't put cuffs on Mr. Cluck! What will the kids think?"
Stuart Bagget”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I've never been in this part of Trenton before. I don't feel comfortable driving around buildings that haven't got gang slogans sprayed on them. Look at this place. No boarded-up windows. No garbage in the gutter. No brothers selling goods on the street. Don't know how people can live like this.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I kicked my shoes off, shuffled out of the black jeans and carted an armload of food into my bedroom. I switched the television on and crawled into bed with the channel changer. Do I know how to have a good time, or what?”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“We gotta be professional about this," Lula said, aiming us toward Route 1. "We need a plan. How about we get the nail polish first, then we get the guy?”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I shuddered at the mention of Mrs. Steiger.
"What's that about?" Ranger asked.
"Mrs. Steiger is the Antichrist."
"Damn," Ranger said. "I left my Antichrist gun at home."
"Looks like you brought everything else."
"Never know when you'll need some tear gas."
"If we have to gas Mrs. Steiger, it"ll ruin my chances of being Miss Burg in the Mayflower parade.”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“Your cousin Maureen just got a job at the button factory. They're probably still hiring."
Helen Plum”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

“I rooted through my pocketbook and did a fast paraphernalia inventory. I was carrying defense spray, which was a big no-no in a crowded mall. And I carried a stun gun, which on close examination turned out to need a new battery. My two pairs of cuffs were in working order, and I had an almost full can of hair spray. Okay, probably I wasn't the world's best-equipped bounty hunter. But then what did I really need to bring in an old guy with a nose that looked like a penis and a loser hot dog vendor?”
― Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly