Wtf Quotes

“All women love semi-rape. They love to be taken.It was his sweet brutality against my bruised body that made his act of love so piercingly wonderful.”
― Ian Fleming, The Spy Who Loved Me

“The number of people on whose cooperative efforts your eventual existence depends has risen to approximately 1,000,000,000,000,000,000, which is several thousand times the total number of people who have ever lived.”
― Bill Bryson, A Short History of Nearly Everything

“I wanted to curl up into a fetal position and start sucking my thumb, let my tears and dripping saliva pool under me.

Sorry. I tried living, tried being sentient. Can't do it. Can't live in the same universe with that.”
― David Wong, John Dies at the End

“Is there anybody alive out there?”
― Bruce Springsteen

“Primarily, shapeshifters of the animal variety remain true to animal kingdom rules in their sexual behaviors. I cant say Ive ever seen two male shack up, set up housekeeping, and make crème brûlée together in their nest of love.”
― Dakota Cassidy, Accidentally Catty

“She could already feel small waves of her juices fall from her newly-broken pussy, making a damp spot under her ass.”
― Lola Newmar, Loving Scarlett

“I'm bound to you Stern. To the women who brought me out of hell. I will serve you 'till the end of days.”
― Leigh Bardugo, Hell Bent

“Oh yes! Smell how much I need you!" Taylor's hips bucked over and over, desperately searching for a part of their bodies to wet with her cream.”
― Lola Newmar, A Bride for Two Billionaires

“The story of Yoshitsune and the Thousand Cherry Tres was both simple and complicated. Simple in that things never change: people consistently jealous or secretive or brave-hearted. As for the rest, it all came down to a series of misunderstandings, the type that could happen to anyone, really. You assume that the sushi bucket is full of gold coins, but instead it's got Kokingo's head in it. You think you know everything about your faithful follower, but it turns out that he's actually an orphaned fox who can change his shape at will. It was he who spoke my favorite line of the evening, five words that perfectly conveyed just how enchanting and full of surprises this Kabuki play really is: 'That drum is my father.”
― David Sedaris

“You want to take all my money slow with success, so far you have taken 120$ and they aren't return back and you want more and more and more...”
― Deyth Banger

“In one city, a famous gangster robbed a bank of a thousand pounds and spent the whole lot on Wonka bars that same afternoon. And when the police entered his house to arrest him, they found him sitting on the floor amidst mountains of chocolate, ripping off the wrappers with the blade of a long dagger.”
― Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

“Are you starting your period? It’s not your time.”
― RuNyx, The Emperor

“I lingered round them, under that benign sky: watched the moths fluttering among the heath and hare-bells; listened to the soft wind breathing through the grass; and wondered how any one could ever imagine unquiet slumbers for the sleepers in that quiet earth.”
― Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights

“He took off my flip-flops and began kissing my feet, sucking my toes.”
― Melissa Broder, The Pisces

“My mother looked at me, her long turquoise nail on the lift button. “Darling, I do hope, since you haven’t yet found a lover, that you’re masturbating regularly, as I suggested.”
― Tanith Lee, The Silver Metal Lover

“I can feel her throat work under my touch as she swallows. “I know that, but you hurt me in other ways.”

“Shut up, you like what I do to you. Even when I’m rough with you, you come, so don’t fucking lie.”
― C. Hallman, The Hate Vow

“The girl's cigarette released this shocking pink smoke reserved for the feminine genre.”
― Sergio Cobo, A Story of Yesterday

“Who the fuck would try to steal a placenta?”
― Phillip Andrew Bennett Low, Monsters in a Mirror: Strange Tales from the Chapel Perilous

“The door flung open, and the President's daughter burst into the room. 'Daddy!' she cried, unfazed by his lack of pants.”
― Phillip Andrew Bennett Low, Monsters in a Mirror: Strange Tales from the Chapel Perilous

“I felt as if I were balancing a pyramid of eggs on the end of my nose”
― Jacqueline Pascarl, Once I Was a Princess

“He gave it one last tightening tug and uttered a firm, “Stay.”

“Woof,” I replied.”
― A. Kirk, Demons at Deadnight

“Fascinating!” Jayden was almost gleeful. “Yet another one you’re immune to, so it seems. Like Tristan’s hallucinating. And you can hold Matthias’s whips. Perhaps you should try to drown me.”

I looked at him. “Are you crazy? Next you’ll want me to suffocate Logan!”

“Excellent,” Jayden smiled. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

"What?” Logan backed away.”
― A. Kirk, Drop Dead Demons

“I feel feral.”
― Tarryn Fisher

“His accent... British but crisper.”
― Shannon Messenger, Keeper of the Lost Cities

“I do. I want five hundred an hour,” I tell him, keeping my voice even and strong.

“Five hundred? Do you think you have some kind of unicorn pussy?”
― C. Hallman, The Hate Vow

“I’m Ciara. Sorry, Rosalina,” she says, voice low and sultry. “I’m needy. He sent me here before I even finished, you know.”

“Who sent you here?”

“The Prince of Thorns,” Ciara, Astrid, and Marigold all say at the same time.

I gape at them. “Wait, what? You were mid-bang with Caspian then he used his weird horny-thorny magic to send you here? And this isn’t the first time he’s done it?”

Ciara runs her hands through her hair. “Why are the most beautiful men the most fucked?”
― Elizabeth Helen, Bonded by Thorns

“He loved spending time with us and told us often that we were his number one hobby.”
― Jill Duggar, Counting the Cost

“Thank you for this baby," she says from the backseat. "He's beautiful."

I laugh. "You're responsible for the beautiful part, Rachel. The only thing he got from me was his balls."

She laughs. She laughs hard. "Oh, my God, I know," she says.

"They're so big."

We both laugh at our son's big balls.”
― Colleen Hoover, Ugly Love

“As I teased, I smelled the faintest waft of shit coming up from underneath her. It smelled like fertile heaven: peat moss, soil, sod, loam. It smelled good because it was her. She had a perfume, and this was her base note.”
― Melissa Broder, Milk Fed

“fart with lust”
― James Joyce, Selected Letters of James Joyce