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We really need some good heroes on TV. I’m not referring to the “superhero” kind of hero, because between Gotham, The Flash, and Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., we have more than enough of those. I’m referring to well-written protagonists that an audience can actually sympathize with. You can be an unlikable character and do unlikable things, and still endear yourself to others. Lately, though, there’s been a steep rise in antiheroes and “unlikable” characters that seems to totally miss the mark.

By definition, an antihero is a protagonist who lacks the morality, charm, or kindness that a hero should ideally have. And that’s fine. That’s good. That’s great. Most of us struggle with being good in our day-to-day lives. It’s so easy to be selfish or cruel. Those impulses are relatable and there is a special kind of catharsis in seeing characters who indulge in these amoralities. However, there’s been a rise of purposely unlikable heroes in television lately, and it’s driving me up the wall. It’s not enough that these characters break rules or act a little bit selfish; they have the impertinence to be downright annoying.

The thing is, I know I’m not crazy. I’m not the only person out there who is going nuts watching these shows. The Observer‘s Drew Grant penned an essay just last month on the subject of HBO’s “AnnoyingHero” — a brilliant term she coined — and she cuts right to the core of the problem with these characters. She writes: “And while being unlikable, or vapid, or a social sledgehammer or whatever might be the most obvious trait you’d notice in someone you’ve just met, it is never, ever the vital one. It seems personality-defining to be rude and graceless, but it’s not.”

The reason why I think many have trouble “liking” the characters on The Newsroom, Girls, The Comeback, or even The Mindy Project, is because while they are realistically selfish, they aren’t much else. And so, it’s not just that you don’t like a character; you can’t bring myself to even care about them, and by extension, you can’t get pulled into their shows. We can root for a character who does terrible things, but we can’t root for a character we can’t care about.

I’m not saying that I want every character to be oozing with charm. I don’t want to watch people being totally nice to each other all the time. I just want to be able to actually emotionally relate to the characters I see on TV. Amazon’s spellbinding comedy Transparent features many realistically self-absorbed characters who do and say terrible things. We see extramarital affairs, spousal neglect, jealousy, selfishness, and sheer bigotry. However, what kept me so transfixed was that the drama erupted because the characters on that show felt love, wanted love, and foolishly didn’t know how to communicate any of this. I understand this! Anyone with a soul understands this. Not to mention that their problems are made a tad bit more complex by the fact that Maura is coming out as transgender in a world that is still adjusting to that term.

Girls producer Jenni Konner takes exception to critics who dislike Girls because the characters are “unlikable,” and I get why. “Likability is silly,” Konner said during a recent Q&A at the New York Television Film Festival. “We all go through our lives making choices to enjoy people who are not perfect.” Yes, this is true, but I would point out that as much as we need complex, messy characters who are hopelessly flawed, we also need to be able to care about them. As Konner says, we have to at least enjoy them.

So, what typically sparks empathy? It’s not just recognizing yourself in a character. You’ve got to be able to understand the logic or emotion behind the destructive things a character says or does. A big reason why so many people accepted the atrocities committed by Walter White was because the Breaking Bad pilot shows him as a complete underdog. He’s boorish, down-on-his-luck, and dying of cancer. You want him to stand up for himself. And so, you emotionally relate to White as he transforms from nebbish everyman to crazy bad guy. You understand the catalyst for his behavior. Likewise, we care about Amy in Gone Girl (which is not a TV show, but stay with me) because we can understand why she felt so scorned by Nick. She may be a sociopath, but she’s a sociopath with a point.

I think that’s at the heart at what makes this new wave of “edgy” unlikable characters so utterly unlikable: what are their points? That their happiness supersedes everyone else’s? That it’s fun to be pushy or rude? That it’s hard out there for a 24-year-old? Okay, but those all seem like mundane problems that can easily be overcome by a self-help book. Why should I care? Because if you can’t make me care, I’m going to switch off and watch something else. That’s why your character needs to be likable. If the audience doesn’t care, then the audience isn’t going to watch the show.

Well, they might hate-watch it and write long think pieces about it later.

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[Photos: Everett Collection]